


First Comes Love

by Sammy_is_obsessed



Series: When is Enough Enough? [Intrulogical Series] [2]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Human AU, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Remus suddenly realizes he wants to marry Logan, Remy and Emile are in it for a hot sec, TW homophobic parents, This was gonna be eight chapters tops at first, What a funny joke am I right?, but a lot more fluff so not to worry!, fluff/angst, oh what fun let's see what happens!, remile - Freeform, sequel to When is Enough Enough?, so you can skip it if need be, there's a smut chapter but it's not necessary to understand the story, there's kinda a good deal of angst, tw homophobia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-07
Updated: 2020-09-01
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:01:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 34,727
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25125871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sammy_is_obsessed/pseuds/Sammy_is_obsessed
Summary: After healing from his accident, Remus has settled into comfortable domesticity living with Logan. Lying awake looking at Logan's sleeping figure just two weeks prior to their one-year-anniversary, a thought suddenly strikes Remus:He wants to marry him.
Relationships: Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders, Intrulogical - Relationship, background moceit - Relationship, background prinxiety, romantic Intrulogical - Relationship
Series: When is Enough Enough? [Intrulogical Series] [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1820077
Comments: 167
Kudos: 222





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, if you haven't read the short fic that proceeds this, you'll probably be a little confused. This, at least as far as I know so far, should be a really light-hearted and fun little proposal-themed fic. I'd love to hear what you thought of the first chapter and kudos are always appreciated. Have a good day/night!

Remus’s eyes cracked open against the morning sunlight streaming in through the blinds, harsh and irritating. He was surprised to find that he’d woken unprompted – usually, he slept far heavier than Logan did. Logan’s grip around him was lose, but his head lay against his chest, mouth parted as he snored lightly. Logan would _never_ admit that he snored, which Remus found absolutely hilarious.

Careful not to stir him too much, Remus craned his neck to steal a glance at the clock. Damn it, ten minutes till Logan had to wake up for work. It was stupid, but lately, Remus was wishing more and more he could spend the entirety of his days with Logan by his side. Obviously, that wasn’t possible. Logan had a job as a teacher and while Remus worked from home as a writer, he still couldn’t occupy all his free time kissing and having sex, as much as he wanted to.

It felt so silly. In past relationships, Remus had certainly _wanted_ his partners. He’d cared about them, at least to a degree, and he’d enjoyed their company. But his relationships with his exes were a far cry from love. But now here Remus was, lying in bed with his boyfriend thinking about how much he simply liked existing in the same place as him.

Remus had lived alone for so long, it was odd, at first, sharing a home with Logan. He’d let himself fall into slobbish behavior early into childhood, habits that hadn’t really been broken until now. Because even if he didn’t give a shit about leaving a pair of underwear on the floor, _Logan_ certainly did. Remus might be irritated with how tidy Logan liked to keep everything if it weren’t for the fact that he was so head-over-heels for the guy. He’d do practically anything for him; when had he gone so soft?

Remus’s eyes settle back over his boyfriend, tracing the lines of his face slowly. In his sleep, Logan always looked so peaceful. Not in a creepy, corpsey way, or anything like that. He just looked content, relaxed. The worry lines that seemed etched into his forehead disappeared as he slept, his face slack and at ease. Remus hoped, maybe a little selfishly, that Logan slept better with him than he ever had alone. Remus certainly slept better now that he shared a bed with Logan.

Logan’s hair was mused from sleep, something that he would be sure to fix when he woke up. He liked to look presentable and said it often enough for the fact to be drilled into Remus’s skull, which made messing it up again when he got home all the more fun. And Logan let him, too. He laughed lightly as Remus combed a hand through his hair, not swatting him away or discouraging him. Remus was fairly certain Logan liked him messing it up almost as much as he enjoyed doing it.

Hesitantly, Remus let his fingers sink into his boyfriend’s dark hair, stroking gently the way you might pet a kitten you’re intent on keeping in your lap. Logan stirred, groaning softly. Remus hadn’t intended on waking him, but ah well, it was almost time to get up anyhow.

Watching Logan’s nose scrunch up as he combed through his hair, a thought suddenly played through his head:

 _I want to marry him_.

_Whoa._

Where the fuck did that come from?

Remus felt the thought dragging him down in a way that most irrational, intrusive thoughts did. For a moment he tried to think of something else, _anything_ else but his mind was simply swimming with thoughts of him and Logan at the alter smiling so wide, kissing one another and crying.

“Mm… Remus?” Logan’s eyes fluttered open. Remus did what he could to shove the thought to the back of his brain. (foolish really, he knew better than anyone how little repression worked)  
  
“Morning, Dragonfly,” Remus said sleepily with a lopsided smile, continuing to card through his hair. “How’d you sleep?”  
  
“Fine,” Logan grunted drowsily, sitting up and rubbing a hand along the back of his neck, “What time is it?”

“Just a little before six-thirty,” Remus responded, throwing his arms around Logan again and pulling him back down into the mattress, “Still time to cuddle. Or, _something else_ , if we’re quick.” Logan let out a sigh, pressing his face into the crock of Remus’s neck, his arms and legs wound around him.

“You know there’s no time for that, love. Perhaps later tonight, though…” Logan trailed off, his voice still thick with exhaustion. Remus’s fingers proceeded their movement along Logan’s skull, massaging lightly.

“Promises, promises, Dragonfly,” Remus huffed through a laugh. Silence settles over them like a heavy throw blanket, thick but not uncomfortable. Before Logan, Remus had never really learned how to be quiet, shutting up just didn’t seem to be in his nature. He dared to say he was learning. It was painfully domestic, but Remus was always content being in Logan’s presence, even in silence.

“Our anniversary is coming up in two weeks now,” Logan said suddenly, after a long while of quiet.

Remus knew this, of course, he did. Even if he’s not usually all that good with remembering dates, he had it written on the calendar highlighted in a million colors, circled, too. He had more than one reminder set on his phone. They’ll have been together a year.

Why did the fact make Remus's heart ache so? it's not as though he was unhappy about it; quite the contrary, he was thrilled to be approaching such a milestone with Logan. But even so, he could feel goosebumps prickling upon his skin.

“Yeah, a year since we nearly fucked in your brother’s backyard.” Even buried in his neck, Remus knows Logan’s making a face.

“We most certainly did _not_. We merely kissed and…”

“And talked about all the sex we were gonna have back at your place? And then went back to your place, and had all of that aforementioned sex?” Logan sighed.

“Well, _yes_. But it was more than that…”

“Oh, _I_ know that. Come on, Logan, do you really think that’s not one of my favorite memories?” He could feel Logan’s skin heating up against him slightly. “The first time I got to kiss the love of my life.”

Logan stiffened beneath him. For a moment, Remus racked his brain as to why that might be – only to catch up with the fact that he didn’t recall ever referring to Logan as the love of his life before. Those were weighty words, and he’d let em slip. _Shit_.

“I –,” Remus blurted, only to have his words silenced by Logan’s lips slotted against his own. It was a slow, early-morning kiss, far less passionate than many of their embraces are. But Remus didn’t hesitate his melting into it for a second. Remus sat up, pulling Logan into his lap so that Logan’s legs were wrapped around his middle, his hands dug into his boyfriend’s hair. Logan’s hands settled on Remus’s bare back - Remus insisted on sleeping in the buff - fingers just brushing. The tension that had hung thick in Remus’s mind dissipated, if only for a moment. 

“I love you too,” Logan said softly, sincerely, their mouths still so close his breath brushed against Remus’s face, “Very, very much.”

And with that, the alarm began going off. Remus groaned as Logan pulled himself away. He reached out, ever so slightly, only for Logan to shoot him a pointed glare.

“Don’t you _dare_ try and lure me back to bed. I refuse to be late to work because you’re in need of a cuddle.” Remus sighed, accepting his defeat and watched as Logan rose to his feet, arching his back and groaning at the deceive pop his spine made. The sound gave Remus ideas of a torture scene he could write. He'd have to jot that down.

“You’re no fun!” Logan laughed lightly as he took a polo shirt of its hanger in the closet, reaching into the dresser for pants and a tie.

“So I’ve heard. Go back to bed, Remus, you’re being needlessly grouchy.”

Remus wanted to have the energy to eat breakfast with Logan, to even make him a meal, maybe. But he’d stayed up late writing a new idea for a chapter, late enough that Logan had drug him from his laptop, scolding him all the way to bed. He was _tired_ and working from home allowed him to work out a schedule that allowed sleeping late into the morning, if such a thing could even be called a schedule, really.

He collapsed back against the pillows, pulling the blankets up to his chin.

“Fine. Try not to let any kids set the science lab on fire, okay, Dragonfly?” Remus laughed as Logan let out a strained sigh.

“It was _one_ time, and it wasn’t my fault. I don’t have eyes on the back of my head, for Christ’s sake!”

“Go easy on the troublemakers. They’ve got enough problems as it is.” Remus smiled, watching as Logan adjusted his tie. He would comb his hair when he got in the bathroom, it was still mussed, just the way Remus liked it.

“I already go easy enough on the troublemaker I’ve got at home,” Logan muttered as he bent down to kiss Remus gently. “Goodbye, love. Have a good day, I’ll see you when I get home.”

“See ya, nerd. Go be a good example for those kids, or whatever.” Logan smiled in a healthy mix of fondness and annoyance. Remus liked to think the fondness outweighed the annoyance most of the time. Logan pressed a final kiss to the crown of Remus’s head before walking to the doorway.

“Pleasant dreams. I love you, Remus,” he said softly, closing the door behind him.

“I love you too,” Remus said, even though Logan had already disappeared into the next room.

As Remus lay against the pillows, quickly succumbing to his exhaustion, a thought clung tight to his mind:

_I want to marry him._

He doubted it could be chalked up to irrationality, rash though he could be. This desire wasn’t new, not really. He’d felt a similar burn the first time he’d kissed Logan, the first time they’d made love, the first time Logan had said “I love you”, when Logan visited him after the accident when they moved in together. Like a heat in his belly that grew in intensity every time he was reminded of just how strongly he felt for Logan, Remus was becoming consumed in the flames.

Logan was the love of his life. He’d said it, just moments ago. Remus was happy, deliriously happy. Happier than he’d been in _years_ , and Logan was the cause.

Remus shut his eyes, finally settling into the idea, embracing the desire, at least a little bit. Remus drifted back to slumber, mind buzzing lightly with that pleasant, only slightly mad idea:

Remus wanted to marry Logan.

=+=


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remus and Roman have a phone conversation about Remus's plans, chronicling Brotherly bonding as well as developing plans of a grand proposal.

“So you’ve finally lost your mind? I always knew this day was coming… still, it’s sooner than I might’ve thought.”

Remus laughed into the phone, visualizing the look of disbelief on his twin’s face.

“I don’t know if my head’s ever been clearer in all my life.”

“Jesus _Christ_ , that was sappy. Are you stealing my bit – are you the sap now? Remus, seriously, what the hell? You can’t be serious about this.” Remus pressed the phone close to his ear, amused with Roman’s dramatics for once in his life.

“I am, though. Ro, it just came to me this morning, looking at his sleeping face. I realized I want to spend the rest of my life with him.”

“Okay, who are you and what have you done with my brother? Remus, what in the world?! You’re never so lovey-dovey, and I mean. It’s not even been a year yet. Isn’t that like, insanely quick?”

“It’s _about_ to be a year, though,” Remus pointed out, as though that made things seem any less abrupt, “In two weeks. And I was friends with Logan even before we got together. I’m _serious_ , Roman. I want to marry him. I want to get down on one knee and promise him anything he wants – Jesus _fuck_ , is it exhausting being this level of dramatic every day? How the hell does Virgil stand it?” Roman huffed out a sigh on the other end.

“Yes, it’s positively draining being so extra,” Roman said, only somewhat sarcastically, “Are you sure you aren’t… rushing into things a bit headstrong?”

“When have I ever been known to be anything besides headstrong?”

“I can think of a few things. Brash, abrasive, a real pain in the ass –.”  
  
“Oh, don’t start on a list, I’ll never get you to shut up.”

“You _know_ what I mean, Remus. Surely you must. Logan is a very well put-together person, someone who values order. Don't get me wrong, you two are wonderful for one another, you really are. I mean, you’ve found someone who can tolerate your antics, so you’d better hang onto him.”

“Roman.”

“Oh shut up, I’m allowed to tease you now.”

It was strange, the shift they’d encountered in their relationship. Going from almost no contact to chatting fairly regularly and hanging out with friends was something that was certainly jarring in the beginning. It was still a lot for Remus to wrap his head around, sometimes, having a brother at his disposal who was supportive and wanted nothing more than the best for him. Roman being one of Logan’s closest friends was certainly a bonus.

Both twins had become so uncomfortably used to not having a close family member in their lived, and now having one another, they still had their moments of astonishment.

“Hate to break it to you, bro, but we teased each other long before we were ‘allowed’ to.”

“Be that as it may,” Roman sighed, “I’m just… I’m worried. I love both you and Logan so much, but I can’t help but fear that this might scare him. I mean, this would be such a major step. Are you certain this is something you’d like to go through with. You must realize there’s absolutely no rush to this, there isn’t a time limit.” 

“Just because you haven’t popped the question yet doesn’t mean I can’t, y’know?” Roman sputtered in what appeared to be an attempt at coherent speech, failing miserably in that department.

“How dare you?!”

“Dude fucking relax. I’m just saying –.”

“I get it, okay! It’s not like I haven’t been thinking about it!” Remus’s end went dead for a moment before Remus replied, smug as ever.

“Are you ‘bout to propose to your emo? I mean you two are practically attached at the hip, it’s a wonder you aren’t already married with a thousand kids yet.”

“Stop it, you’re being unnecessarily cruel.”

“Aren’t I always, brother dearest?”

Remus wished he could see the look on his brother’s face, the grin that surely betrayed all of the fondness in his rumbling chuckle. He’d called him after waking up a few hours after Logan had left for work, not even sure if he would have the time to pick up. Remus couldn’t admit how grateful he was that Roman had answered the call even if he wanted to. Even with the sudden sureness he felt that Logan was the one for him, forever and always, Remus was sure he was going to start bouncing off the walls anytime now. He was stupidly, deliriously in love, sure that the things he felt for Logan could drive him to a madness rarely seen in humankind.

Remus still wasn’t entirely used to it, the strength of his emotions. For so long, he’d been nothing but a nuisance, mostly intentionally. He wanted attention, and by hell or high water, he would do anything to get it. He’d talk to most anyone who would listen, telling of the macabre, strange facts he had amassed a wealth of knowledge of. Most people shuddered, turning away at disgust at the person who Remus portrayed himself to be. Even the individuals he dated didn’t take him seriously, not really. He wasn’t even sure if he’d taken himself seriously then, in hindsight, probably not.

And then there’d been Logan. Logan who listened, Logan who cared more than he gave himself credit, Logan who _loved_. Logan who, upon their being friends, claimed to be emotionless. Remus didn’t buy it for a second, but still, he couldn’t help but be thrown for a loop when he finally realized how deep Logan’s emotions ran, as well as the feelings the man provoked in him.

Logan had given him more than he would ever realize. He restarted a heart Remus had long since believed was cold and unbeating. He’d been by his side at Remus’s weakest point. In some strange twist of fate, Logan had brought Roman back into his life when he called Roman informing him of his being hospitalized. And from there on their love had only continued to bloom. Because of meeting Logan, Remus had a real relationship with his brother again, he had people he could call his friends, he had a love unlike anything he’d ever known.

Remus had someone who he woke up with every morning, he had someone who he spent his evenings with. Remus had a companion who would entertain any and all of his strange fascinations, he had a partner who encouraged his writing more than anyone ever had, even while Logan was no real horror fan himself, he had someone who made him feel whole and human.

Remus had been granted everything he didn’t know he needed, and the realization that he couldn’t let that slip from his grasp was a compelling force.

“Yes, you’re a pest as always,” Roman said. Remus could practically see his eyes rolling, dramatic as ever, “I’m just trying to look out for you, is all. I love you, okay? And I love Logan. I don’t want you to rush into anything that could have nasty consequences.”

“I love him,” Remus said simply, a smile stretching over his face, “I love him so fucking much, Ro.”

“I know you do.”

“He’s my whole world. Isn’t that insane? I never… I didn’t think I’d ever get anything like that. Love, I mean. I didn’t know anyone could love me, not the way he does.”

“It’s not insane,” Roman said, some of the hesitations seeming to have left him, if only momentarily, “Not at all. I know Logan’s told you of my initial reaction to finding out about you two.”

“Oh, _many_ times. He said you looked white as a ghost – whish I coulda seen it! I’m sure it was funny as all hell.” Roman sighed, exasperated as Remus chuckled at the idea of Roman being so flabbergasted about him and Logan being an item. It hadn’t been so long ago, only a few months.

“Right. What I’m trying to say is that, he’s brought out the best in you. I’d like to say you’ve brought out the best in him, but Logan’s certainly been more chaotic lately.”

“I’m proud of that!” Remus replied boisterously, “My Dragonfly’s letting his walls down. He’s so soft with me… I, it’s silly… how much it makes my chest ache, just thinking about him. You never told me how much love burns. It’s not bad, just... weird.”

“Looks like you’ve both gone soft. I never expected it, and certainly not from Logan. You’re both full of more surprises than I suppose I realized.”

“So… still think it’s an absolutely terrible idea to ask Logan to marry me?” Roman paused, mulling the question over for a moment almost long enough to send Remus into a panic before responding carefully, saying:

“Ask Logan about marriage. Nothing overt, mind you. Just his feelings on the matter. You don’t want to pull something like this out-of-the-blue, I don’t imagine he’d fare too well.” Remus considered his brother’s advice, nervously thinking about how he’d possibly breach the subject without falling apart. Even so…he supposed Roman made a good point. While much of their relationship thus-far had been fairly spontaneous, throwing Logan into a situation like this without at least a little warning could spell trouble.

“Okay. Yeah, I think you might be right. Fuck look at me taking advice from you. You think you’ll ever take a piece of my advice?" Roman laughed softly.

“At this point, I’m not sure if I’d doubt it. So long as you’re not advising I spontaneously decide to ask for Virgil’s hand.”

“Well…”

“ _No_. Absolutely not. Just because _you’re_ already thinking about marriage doesn’t mean that I am.” Remus wasn’t buying that for a second.

“Oh come on, _Bro_ man. The way you gush about him, you’d think you guys were already married. Knowing you, you’ve already got the whole thing mapped out in your mind.”

“I… might have an idea or two…” Remus barked out a laugh.

“Of fucking course you do! If you’re telling me I should have a talk about marriage with Logan, you might want to do the same thing with Virgil.”

“Remus – we’re not talking about my relationship, we’re talking about yours.”

“Trying to take the heat off of yourself isn’t going to work, dude. I’m being serious.”

“As am I. Seriously, Remus. Talk to him, before you go any further. From the sounds of things, you’re already building it up in your mind.” Remus stood up from where he’d sat on the bed, rising to his feet and looking out the window at the blue sky, only vaguely remembering that he needed to hold the phone to his ear with how lost in himself he was becoming.

“I can’t help it! I just… he’s so perfect, Ro. And he loves _me_.”

“He really does.” Suddenly, Remus was struck with an idea that he considered absolute genius.

“Hey, if I talk about marriage with Logan, can I ask you and Virge a favor?”

“So long as it has nothing to do with hiding a body on our property, I’m listening.” Remus grinned widely, his mind running rampant with a quick-forming plan.

“Can you guys host another party, like the one you did a year ago in say, two weeks?” Remus was sure he could hear the gears in his twin’s mind grinding.

“Ah… are you actually planning to propose in the same setting that you two got together?”

“Yeah. Wouldn’t that be awesome?”  
  
“Do you think Logan would enjoy that? After all, he isn’t much of a party-person, if that party has anything to say for it.”

“Sure, yeah, but this would be different. It doesn’t need to be big or anything! Just make it similar to that night and, boom, I could propose to him in your backyard!”

“If you’re so certain that’s what you want…then I suppose I could discuss it with Virgil.”

“For real?” The excitement in Remus’s tone amused Roman so.

“Yes, for real. But seriously, Remus, be smart about this. I know how you can be when it comes to doing things on a whim.”  
  
“This isn’t a whim, I swear!” Remus promised, even when the idea to ask for Logan’s hand had only occurred to him this morning.

“Okay. Then I suppose I’ll leave you to your planning. I’m sure you’re aware of my hesitations…” Roman paused, sounding unmistakably proud of his brother suddenly, “But I wish you and Logan the best in life. You two make a good team."

“Thanks bro,” Remus said, trying to disregard how much his heart swelled at his brother’s words, “I’ll talk at you later. Say hi to the emo nightmare for me!”

“Goodbye, Remus.”

And then, once again, Remus was left alone with his thoughts. Thoughts that delved into plans Remus prayed could be successful. 

=+=

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want the creativetwins to have a good relationship so I'm writing it myself! I really enjoy writing Remus as a lovesick fool, and this is by no means any kind of exception to that. I'd love to hear what you thought of the chapter, and kudos are always appreciated. Have a wonderful day/night!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Logan has a heartfelt conversation with a student, and comes home happy as ever to see Remus. However, when Remus brings up the idea of marriage, Logan is taken aback by his emotional response.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I introduced the original character Shelly simply to be a student of Logan's. She's not an important character or anything, but I'm happy with how the scene with her turned out.

The bell rang, signaling that Logan’s final class had ended. His students filed out, talking loudly and excitedly about their plans for the weekend. Logan was about to sling his briefcase over his shoulder, eager to get home to Remus when he heard a small, apprehensive voice behind him:

“Mr. Sanders?” Logan turned around to find a student of his, Shelly, standing at his desk, wringing her hands, anxiety written all over her face.

“Yes, Shelly?” She hesitated for a moment, glancing at the door as if considering not going through with what she wanted to say, before turning her eyes back to Logan.

“Can I talk to you about something?” She asked, sounding small and frightened, “It’ll just take a sec, I swear.” Logan sat back down at his desk, encouraging Shelly to sit at the chair across from him.

“By all means,” he said, hoping he sounded encouraging, “What seems to be the problem?”

Shelly was a good kid, incredibly intelligent, and always so eager to learn and answer questions. She had a passion for knowledge that envied even Logan at her age, and she was an absolute pleasure to have in his class. So seeing her look so apprehensive, shrinking back in her chair as though she wanted to disappear, was something that worried Logan considerably.

“You’re going to think it’s silly that I’m telling you this,” she said quickly, her breath hitching, “But uh… I’m gay.” Perhaps Logan hadn’t been wearing the proper facial expression, because quickly she was delving into an explanation. “I – I’m only telling you because you’re the first openly gay teacher I’ve ever had! It’s, uh, helped knowing I’ve got someone in my life who’s like me. I haven’t told very many people and I’m just –.”

“Hey,” Logan interjected, his voice soft, “It’s completely alright, Shelly. There’s no need to explain yourself. I know how hard it can be to tell somebody that, not to mention coming to terms with it yourself. I appreciate you thinking that you could come to me with this, it couldn’t have been easy.”

Utter relief shone on her face as the fear dissolved into a shaky smile.

“I – uh, yeah. I kinda just realized, and it’s been a lot…I’ve been wondering, but I thought I’d grow to like boys, y’ know?” Logan nodded, recalling a time when he’d done the very same thing, trying to force an attraction to women.

“I do.”

“It’s really nice, you having the rainbow flag in the classroom,” she muttered, motioning to the small pride flag that was stationed in a coffee mug full of pens, “And the picture of you and your boyfriend. You guys look really happy together. When you put that up, it just made me feel like I needed to tell somebody.”

Logan felt his heart swell in his chest. He’d put the picture on his desk just three days ago, a photo of he and Remus at the beach, their smiles wide and joyful. The love in their eyes would be impossible to deny, and something Logan had thought would only hold significance to him meant something to his student. It showed her visibility and encouraged her to open up. Logan couldn’t help but feel proud.

“Well, I’m glad that my classroom has helped make you feel comfortable,” Logan said, before remembering something that might be of importance, “You know, I host GSA in my class on Thursdays. The student body who run it are great kids, and if you ever feel interested, I’d encourage you to give it a try. It’s a wonderfully accepting environment.”

Shelly’s smile was still very much anchored in nervousness, but Logan could see the relief that permeated it.

“I might have to check it out,” she said, standing up from her chair, “Thanks, Mr. S. It, uh, means a lot.” Logan nodded, standing with her.

“Of course, any time,” he said, “Have a nice weakened, Shelly.” His student nodded, slinging a backpack strap over her shoulder and already heading out the door.

“You too, Mr. S.”

Logan watched her disappear out the door before his eyes landed back on the photograph, suddenly all the more excited to get home to his boyfriend. Logan had an impact on a student, simply be existing openly, and that was more than he could’ve hoped for.

The pride he felt didn’t falter as he drove home. It didn’t fade when he arrived at the apartment complex and unlocked the door. A grin spread across his face as he saw Remus scrawling in a notebook at the dining room table – dining room might’ve been a stretch, there was a table and chairs in their small living room where they ate their meals. Nonetheless, it was home. Remus rarely wrote things down on paper, often complaining that he couldn’t keep up with his wild, constantly changing ideas unless he was typing. As a result, only the best, most special ideas were reserved for pen and paper.

“I’m home, dear,” Logan greeted as he set his briefcase down, not failing to see the way Remus stiffened when he noticed Logan, having been so lost in himself. He shut the notebook before quickly making his way to Logan, gathering him up in his arms and kissing him enthusiastically.

“Hey, how was your day?” Remus asked once they’d parted and sat down beside one another on the couch.

“It was wonderful, actually,” Logan said, the happiness in his tone evident. “A student of mine asked to speak to me after class.” Remus quirked an eyebrow, “She came out to me, explaining she’d only recently realized she was gay.” Remus smiled.

“Wow, look at you, being a role-model and shit.” _A role model_. Logan hadn't even considered that. 

“What had encouraged her to tell me was the picture of us I’d put up in my classroom. It couldn’t help but make me think of when I was that age. I had no idea of my sexuality of the time, but the fact that I made some kind of an impact? That’s…well, it makes me very happy.” Remus rested his head on Logan’s shoulder, grabbing his hand and lacing their fingers together.

“That’s great, Dragonfly. I’m sure she really appreciates having someone to look up to who she can relate to.”

That hit Logan hard, knowing that to some extent, one of his students looked up to him. Of course, he wanted to set an example for his students, he was determined to be taken seriously and respected. But actively helping someone feel more comfortable in their identity was something Logan hadn’t ever imagined.

“She said we looked happy,” Logan mused after a moment of silence, “in the photo.” Logan could practically feel himself melting against Remus, fondness welling in his chest. It still took him by surprise sometimes, the intensity of love he felt for his boyfriend.

“Well, of course, we do,” Remus said confidently, kissing Logan’s neck, “I know I’m happier than I’ve ever been being with you.”

“I’m happy, too,” Logan choked out, surprised by how overemotional he was suddenly feeling, “I’m incredibly happy with you, Remus.”

“Aw, Dragonfly, don’t tell me you’re going soft on me now,” Remus teased as if they both hadn’t gone soft long before this moment.

“Never,” Logan said, lying through his teeth as he pressed a kiss to the top of Remus’s head. “How was your day, dear?”

A strange look flickered in Remus’s eyes as he looked at Logan – fear? Anxiousness? – before an unsteady smile settled over his face, as though nothing was the matter.

“It was fine, good,” he said a touch too quickly. Curious.

“I saw you writing in your notebook. Anything special?” Remus bit his lip, the nervousness now unmistakable.

“Uh – kinda? It’s still a pretty half-baked idea, though. Nothing to worry about right now,” Remus explained haltingly.

As much as Logan has felt inadept when dealing with the emotions of others in the past, he’d gotten to know Remus’s cues and patterns so well that this was positively _screaming_ that something was amiss. Remus wasn’t one to get easily embarrassed, and certainly not about his writing ideas. Regardless, Logan didn’t feel it right to bring attention to it. if Remus wanted to talk about something that was bothering him, Logan would by all means give him the space to do so, but for now, he decided he’d let it go unsaid.

“Alright, love,” Logan said, hoping it might ease some of Remus’s concerns, “I’d love to hear about it when it’s a little more fleshed out if you’d like to tell me.”

“Yeah,” Remus said, kissing his boyfriend soundly, some of the tension seeming to have left him, “When it’s finished you’ll be the first to hear about it, I promise.”

The rest of their evening was fairly regular. Remus continued to scrawl in his notebook before returning to his laptop, another idea having evidently struck him. It was Logan’s turn to prepare dinner. He was stirring a pot of pasta sauce when he felt Remus’s eyes on him.

Logan turned around, noticing how Remus had shut his laptop and was looking at him with a reserved, contemplative expression. The kitchen suddenly felt far too small.

“Is something the matter, Remus?” Logan’s soft tone must’ve shaken Remus from his haze because he shook his head, an ill-fitting smile settling over his face.

“No, no not at all,” Remus said, sounding as though he was choosing his words very carefully, “I was just thinking about a conversation I had with Roman earlier today.” Logan nodded unsurely, returning half of his attention to the pot, while still listening intently.

“I see. What did you two talk about?”

“Oh, not much.” Remus was trying to sound casual, as though whatever he was about to say was of little consequence. But he was choosing what he said cautiously, his words coming out far slower and more deliberate than usual. “He went on about Virgil for a while, though.”

“I doubt that’s out of the ordinary in the least bit,” Logan said with a light chuckle, hoping the laughter might filter through some of the tension that had settled over them, “They’re very much in love.”

“Yeah,” Remus said, “They are. From the sounds of things, I think he’s planning on asking Virgil to marry him.”

Logan’s spoon ceased its motion as it clattered against the side of the pot. Logan braced himself against the countertop, his chest tight. He didn’t dare turn around to face Remus.

“Is that so?” He managed to choke out.

“Uh… _yeah_ ,” Remus said, his voice suddenly too small for him, “I mean, I’m not surprised. They’ve been stupidly in love since the beginning, huh?”

Logan _needed_ to get a grip. He didn’t understand why his reaction would be so intense. Logan had absolutely nothing against Roman and Virgil’s relationship; quite the opposite, he’d supported them since the beginning. They were a wonderful couple, one who’s happiness Logan had admittedly envied before being with Remus. So why, then, was he having such a difficult time swallowing the information?

“They certainly have,” Logan said, managing to pick the spoon up with a trembling hand and resume his stirring, “Well, I wish Roman the best, whenever he chooses to do so. I’m sure it will go well.”

“Logan…” Remus hesitated, pausing momentarily before trying again, “Are you okay?”

“Me?” Logan asked, still not daring to look at Remus, “I’m perfectly fine. Why do you ask?”

“I dunno,” Remus said, sounding as if he was biting something back, “You seem a little… jumpy. And not in the good way, either.”

“I wasn’t aware there was a ‘good’ way to be jumpy.”

“Oh, sure, like when you watch a scary movie. Or go to a haunted house. Spooky shit.”

“Right.”

“But, uh, seriously, Dragonfly, are you good?”

“I’m fine,” Logan insisted, finally daring to make eye-contact, and doing everything in his power to steady his breathing. “What else did you and Roman discuss?”

“Well,” Remus said, trying to get back on track. It seemed Logan’s odd behavior had shaken him up, “When I was done teasing him –.”

“Which I’m sure took a considerable amount of time.”

“Oh, you know it!” Remus said, some normalcy seeping back into his tone, if only for a moment, “But after that, we talked about the idea of him talking about the idea of marriage with Virge. Y’ know, so he doesn’t blindsight the poor guy if he decides to propose anytime soon.”

There it was again, a distractingly dramatic ache in his chest. He didn’t grip onto the counter again, thinking of how it might startle his boyfriend, but the feeling could not be ignored. Why was he behaving this way? The idea of Roman and Virgil wedding was something he had no ill feelings about, there was no reason to be upset by the prospect of such a thing. But he wasn’t upset, was he? This was something different… something stranger.

For a reason he could not understand, Logan felt a surge of _jealousy_.

Even so, he would look strange if he didn’t provide some kind of response. Surely, he was already rousing suspicion with his damned silence.

“That’s understandable,” he said, managing to sound coherent and sane, at least he hoped so, “After all, Virgil suffers from a great deal of anxiety. Though knowing Roman, he wouldn’t put him through anything too severe. They know each other quite well by now, I don’t doubt his competence on such a matter.”

“What do you think about that?” Logan knitted his eyebrows together as he turned back to Remus.

“I’m not sure I know what you’re asking.”

“About marriage, I mean,” Remus clarified, his voice wobbling just slightly, “That’s an important thing for couples to talk about, right?” The dull ache in Logan’s chest increased in pressure, threatening to induce wheezing, gasping breaths.

“I – are you asking my opinion on the institution of marriage?” Logan asked, feeling anxiety pool in his stomach. Remus shook his head.

“No, nothing like that. the ‘institution’ of marriage is its own kind of a mess as it is.”

“Certainly. Not to mention the grotesquely high prices that the wedding business charges. As well as the many social pressures when it comes to marriage.”

“Right – _shit_ , I’m getting off-topic,” Remus said, frustration seeping into his voice as he threaded his hands through his hair.

“What are you trying to ask?”

“What I’m trying to ask is…” something akin to panic flickered in Remus’s eyes as he took a deep breath before continuing, “… what are your thoughts on marriage? You know, the idea of getting married, someday.”

It wasn’t something Logan had given much consideration in the past. In all honesty, he hasn’t imagined _ever_ being in any kind of a long-term, loving relationship. So the ides of planning for a future he didn’t think possible was not something he wasted his time on. Now, though, Remus was asking him a question with more sincerity and vulnerability than it seemed he was intending.

“I suppose I haven’t given the idea much thought,” Logan admitted, praying the tremor in his every movement wasn’t too noticeable. “I didn’t think… that is to say, I hadn’t thought of myself as someone…”

“Dragonfly, the pot’s boiling over!” Remus words cut through whatever it was that Logan was trying to blather.

“Shit!” he exclaimed frustrated, returning his full attention to the pot and mopping up the spilled-over sauce.

The question stayed unanswered for much of the rest of the night. The couple ate their dinner in a silence that seemed to have been blanked over them, thick and uncomfortable the way a blanket that you’ve been meaning to throw out for some time is. Remus’s newfound hesitation didn’t waver as they sat down on the couch to watch some nature documentary neither of them were really paying attention to.

They sat together, tangled in an embrace, not unlike their usual routine, but it didn’t seem right. The spaces between their bodies, although small, felt like massive expanses. Neither man dared to let go of the other, but something had occurred between them, something Logan was terrified to name.

“Did… did I fuck up earlier?” Remus asked once the credits had rolled and the screen turned to black. Logan untangled himself from Remus’s limbs, seeing the concern in his eyes even in the darkened room.

“What’re you talking about?” Logan asked as if they weren’t both to some degree aware of the tension that had been building.

“Bringing up the idea of getting married,” Remus elaborated, “I only said it because of the conversation I had with my brother. I wasn’t trying to make you uncom-.”

“You didn’t make me uncomfortable,” Logan cut in with a lie, doubting it sounded believable in the least bit, “I was just… surprised. It’s not something we’ve ever discussed.”

“No. It’s not.”

“But… I think it _should_ be,” Logan said determined to get this right, seeing the change on Remus’s face instantly, “I’m saying… it’s a good thing that you brought it up. We should be open with each other about issues of that kind.”

“Right,” Remus responded, hope elevating, “So… what do you –.”

“I love you,” Logan interrupted, hoping him saying so would do something to make up for the way he’d behaved, “I love you an incredible amount, Remus.”

“I love you too,” Remus said, faltering only slightly, “I’m fucking crazy about you, Dragonfly.”

“And… while marriage isn’t something I’ve allowed myself to consider,” Logan continued, feeling some of the tension building up inside dissolve as Remus took his hand and squeezed it, “It’s not an idea I’m adverse to.”

“Y-yeah?” There was hope in Remus’s eyes, bright and clear.

“Yes. Remus, love, you’re one of the best things that's happened to me, if not the very best. I hope you know how much of my heart you take up,” Logan felt his eyes, despite his best efforts, beginning to water, “I must be spending too much time with Roman,” he breathed out through a watery chuckle, swiping a finger under his eyes, “I swear I never used to talk like this.”

“I think we’ve both been spending too much time with Roman,” Remus said, though it was clear there was no truth behind the remark, “But I’m not so sure we can blame our emotions on his eccentricities,” Remus said, letting go of Logan’s hand and opening his arms for an embrace that was gratefully accepted.

“Perhaps not,” Logan said, burying his face in Remus’s neck and breathing in the scent of his cologne, one he’d helped him pick out, “But I think I’m going to do it anyway.”

“Oh, you rotten man,” Remus teased, pulling Logan as close as he could get, “Maybe our friends are right, I’m a terrible influence on you.”

“Maybe so,” Logan said, feeling contentment wash over him in slow, easy waves. Only moments ago things had felt so unclear and frayed, but that weight had been lifted. They stayed there for a long while, curled up on the couch, before Logan rose to his feet, asking, ever so gently, if Remus was coming to bed soon.

It wasn’t uncommon for Remus to work late into the night, considering his privilege of sleeping late in the mornings as well as the fact that “Inspiration strikes best past midnight, Dragonfly!” Even so, Remus nodded happily, getting ready to go to sleep and sliding into bed beside Logan.

They held one another close as they drifted off, Logan’s mind lingering on their conversation. Remus had brought up the idea of marriage, and that was certainly not something to be taken lightly. Even so…given a little thought, the idea wasn’t upsetting. It was pleasant, even, thinking about having Remus by his side always, promising him everything that he could. Logan had sworn for so long that he was not a creature of sentiment, but he was beginning to doubt the validity of that.

Logan slipped into slumber, thinking of the pride that had swelled in him when Shelly had come out to him as well as the strength of his love for Remus. The conversation didn’t scare him anymore, it excited him.

=+=

Logan was thrown unceremoniously into consciousness, waking up gasping for air, his heart beating out of his chest. Instantly, Remus was stirring beside him, a hand slipping into his.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay, Dragonfly. I’m here. I’m here, LoLo,” he promised sleepily, the same way he did every time Logan woke from a nightmare. Except… this hadn’t been a nightmare, not at all. In fact, it was a wonderful dream, swirling in Logan’s mind as he struggled to catch his breath.

It wasn’t a nightmare about Remus's accident; Logan had dreamed of a wedding. He dreamed of he and Remus in suites, promising their eternal love in front of their friends and family, he dreamed of writing sappy vows that they’d deliver through tears, he dreamed of holding his _husband_ in his arms.

He’d had no idea that their conversation would stir anything in him. He hadn’t recognized the desire that had been building, nor why he felt such jealousy at the idea of Roman and Virgil getting engaged.

It was all far too much to handle.

Logan pulled the covers off of himself as he sat up, swinging his legs over the side of the bed.

“Hey, Lo, are you okay?” Roman asked, watching in the mostly dark room as Logan stumbling to find his glasses on the nightstand, slipping them on haphazardly with shaky hands.

“I’m fine,” Logan swore, “It was just a dream. Go back to sleep, Remus.”

“Are you sure? You know you can talk about it if you want to.” Remus asked, sitting up.

 _No_ , Logan thought to himself, anxiety taking hold, _He_ can’t _wake up. He needs to go back to sleep._

“I’m sure,” Logan said, standing up, the hardwood cold against his bare feet, “I’m alright.”

“If you’re alright then come back to bed,” Remus said, his request gentle, but it couldn’t stop the television static in Logan’s mind from growing louder and more frantic. 

“I’m just going to get something to drink,” he said, “Some chamomile, or something. And then I’ll come back to bed. Go back to sleep, love. I’ll be back before you know it."

Remus clearly wanted to press the matter further, but his own exhaustion got the better of him.

“Okay. And you’ll come and get me if something’s the matter?”

“Of course,” Logan said, pressing a kiss to the top of Remus’s head. It wouldn’t necessarily be the first time that Logan had needed some air after waking up from a dream, though it wasn’t usual.

“Alright then,” Remus said, slowly laying his head back on the pillow, though Logan could still feel his eyes on him.

With that, Logan slipped out of the bedroom, shutting the door behind him. Every fiber of his being seemed to be trembling as he began to brew some tea – only to quell Remus’s suspicions if he came to check on him. _God_ , he prayed he didn’t come to check on him – nearly dropping the teapot on the floor.

After the tea was done, he poured himself a mug that he most likely wouldn’t drink from and pulled out his phone. It was one in the morning, damned late, but if he knew his friend, and he did, Virgil would still be awake.

Logan hesitated momentarily, thinking how rude it would be to call this late, regardless if Virgil was awake or not. But that was quickly disregarded when the weight of his dream buckled down on him in its full force.

He hadn’t just dreamed of marrying Remus. In his moments of startling consciousness, Logan faltered for a moment, struggling to find the difference between fiction and reality. For the tiniest moment, he believed Remus to be his husband and he _liked_ it. As illogical as it all seemed, suddenly he wanted nothing more than to ask Remus to be his for the rest of their lives.

Logan caved, pressing the ‘call’ button, hoping Virgil could talk some sense into him.

Or, and this was the far more dangerous option, validate these feelings.

=+=

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gonna be honest, this chapter turned out a lot longer than I initially intended, but I'm pretty happy with the direction of things. Your guys's comments have been so encouraging so far, so thank you. I'd love to hear what you thought of this chapter and, as always, have a wonderful day/night!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil and Logan talk about Logan's dreams and a jarring conclusion is come to.

"Logan?” Virgil’s voice was laced with exhaustion, but it was clear he hadn’t just been roused from his slumber. Logan considered that a small miracle of some kind. 

“Virgil –.” he cursed the way his voice wavered with such unsteady emotion, turbulent and strong, “I’m – I’m sorry to be calling you so late.”

“Whoa, hey, it’s okay dude,” Virgil assured, hearing the panic in his friend’s voice, “What’s going on?”

“I…I had a dream. Virgil, it was vivid. So vivid…I didn’t… I couldn’t see the difference between it and reality and…” 

“Hey man, it’s going to be okay. Was it another nightmare?” 

Virgil knew well of Logan’s nightmares. Just like he had been with Roman, Logan had been close with Virgil for many years now. He was one of Logan’s closest friends, someone who he knew he could go to with almost any matter, and Virgil would listen with compassion. His snark and wit was something that, while sometimes slightly irritating, brought Logan a great deal of joy. He loved that he could go to his friend about anything, and this was no exception. 

“No. No, it – it wasn’t. I dreamed…I dreamed that Remus and I were married.”

“Oh... _Huh_. And that’s… a bad thing?” 

“ _No_!” Logan hissed, sure to keep his voice as quiet as possible in the fear of disturbing Remus, “I mean, yes. I mean, I don’t know! When I woke up I – I thought it was true, for a moment. I thought Remus was my husband.” 

“Right, uh, okay. I’m not sure if I’m following you here: Did you want to get married?” Logan searched his mind for an answer, searched for the words _No, of course not. That would be completely and utterly ridiculous. We’ve only been dating a short while_. Despite everything, the words never surfaced. “ _Logan_ ,” Virgil repeated, the concern in his tone deepening, “Do you want to get married?”

Logan leaned against the kitchen counter, crushed under the weight of the desires he could no longer ignore.

“I –.” He paused, worrying his bottom lip, before forcing himself to get the word out, “ _Possibly_.”

“Logan, buddy, where the hell did this come from? I mean, you guys have been dating, what, eleven months now?”

“Almost a full year,” Logan muttered, miserable at the onslaught of unbridled _emotion_ , “In two weeks.” Virgil sighed into the phone.

“Okay, sure, yeah. But where did this come from? Was the dream just out of the blue, or what?”

For a moment, Logan was about to explain his conversation with Remus, the jealousy he felt when he was told of Roman’s desire to propose to Virgil – but luckily, even in his state of over emotion, he still had some sense left in him. it wasn’t like he could just _tell_ Virgil about how Roman was planning on proposing to him at some point! Even so, he needed to explain his predicament somehow. 

“Remus brought up the idea of marriage earlier tonight,” Logan explained carefully, “I’ll be honest…my reaction was not the best.”

“What do you mean?”

“To put it bluntly, I freaked out. It just blindsight me, it’s by no means something I’ve considered in the past.” Logan could practically see Virgil gazing at him intently.

“And now you’re all for it?” 

“That’s not… that isn’t what I said.”

“Then what are you saying, Lo?” Logan groaned softly, running a hand through his mussed hair. 

“I don’t know. Before Remus, I’d never allowed myself to consider a future with anyone. As far as I was concerned, I was going to be alone and… I suppose I made peace with that. But then we got closer, and we started dating and… _everything_ changed.” Virgil laughed on the other end, a tired, amused sound.

“Yeah, love will do that to ya. Do you think I had any idea I was going to become as sappy as I’ve become? I mean, Jesus, just the other day I nearly burst into tears when Roman and I were picking out curtains together – and we’ve been living together for months now!” Logan could certainly empathize with that.

“I’m still not entirely used to it. Being so at the mercy of my emotions.”

“Welcome to the club, pal,” Virgil said with a chuckle, “But my point is, it makes sense that you’re getting worked up thinking about how you’ve got someone in your life who you love and who loves you. It can be a lot to take in sometimes.” Silence rung out between them for an uncomfortable moment before Logan spoke again.

“I want to marry him.”

“ _Whoa_ – slow your role, man! Just because you had some dream where you were a married couple?”

“… Yes.” Virgil groaned.

“Oh my god, this _cannot_ be the Logan Sanders I know and love. Logan, dude, do you recognize how fucking insane that sounds?!”

“I do,” Logan said, though his tone of voice seemed to indicate the opposite, “But really, now that I’m considering things, it makes perfect sense.”

“You’re going to have to expand upon that then because I’m lost as fuck.” 

“The entirety of our relationship has been incredibly fast. At first, I’d been opposed to such things, but quickly I found myself not minding the pace that things were going. Despite my initial hesitations, it all felt natural. To put it simply, Remus and I have been “speedrunning” our relationship. I can’t picture being with anyone else, and I don’t imagine he can either, therefore marriage is the next logical step.”

“Okay, but is it really the next ‘logical’ step? Don’t you think you might be rushing into this a bit, man? I mean, I’ve always considered you such a careful planner. How can you possibly know this is the right thing to do based on a dream?” Logan went silent for a moment, lost in his contemplation before posing a question to his friend.

“Can you imagine being with anyone besides Roman?”

“Ah – geez man I don’t know about –.”

“Can you?” Virgil sighed, the sound somewhat defeated.

“No… no, I can’t. Fuck, I love him, a lot – but _hey_ , we’re not talking about Ro and I’s relationship. We’re talking about you here,” Virgil said, clearly intent on steering the topic away from himself.

“I made the connection to you and Roman’s relationship in an effort to help you understand where I’m coming from. I'd never considered the fact that I could be content in a long-term relationship, I didn’t think it was possible, but I _am_. I love Remus immensely, more than I knew I was capable of loving someone else. I don’t ever want to consider the idea of being with anyone else, I just want him.”

“So you’ve decided, just like that, you want to get married?” Virgil asked incredulously, “I mean, just a couple minutes ago you called me sounding _terrified_.”

“Tell me, Virgil, do I still sound terrified?” Virgil paused, mulling the question over before sighing.

“No, you don’t. I guess you sound pretty clear-headed.”

“Precisely. I know I must’ve sounded frantic – I’ll admit, I was _feeling_ rather frantic, and I apologize if that was cause for concern. But now, I feel like I’ve found such clarity. I know this is probably nothing you’d expected of me –,”

“You got that right,” Virgil interrupted pointedly, but there was no bite to his bark. He was quickly adjusting himself to the fact that Logan’s mind seemed very well made-up.

“Yes, well, that is understandable. Regardless, I feel strongly about this. I know it must be strange, me getting so lost in a dream, believe me, it’s just as odd for me to get so wrapped up in something so trivial. But I feel as though it’s sort of been…” Logan trailed off, unsure of his wording.

“A sign?” Virgil supplied hesitantly.

“Something like that, yes. I want him to be my husband, Virgil. It’s as simple as that,” Logan said as if anything about this situation felt simple.

“I know he was the one to bring it up, but do you think Remus will be keen on getting engaged this early in?” Virgil asked, before considering it for a half a second. “You know what? Never mind. Knowing him, he’s already planning on proposing to you or something. I mean, he’s the one who claims to be “Mr. Unpredictable” and all that.” 

The idea made warmth bloom in Logan’s chest.

“Well, I-I don’t know about that. But at the very least, I can be certain he won’t shoot the idea down entirely.”

“And you’re not scared?” Virgil asked, “Of such a big change, I mean.” Logan laughed softly, still mindful of his sleeping boyfriend.

“Scared? Of course not. I’m positively _terrified_.” It was Virgil’s turn to laugh, it seemed, barking one out at sentiment. “Nonetheless, this is what I want.”

“Okay, L,” Virgil said finally, settling into the idea, “If that’s what you want, then you’ve got my support.” Logan sighed, more than a little relieved to have his friend onboard. He’d need all the help he could get to pull this thing off.

“Thank you, Virge. That means a great deal.”

“Yeah, yeah. What’re friends for, am I right?” Virgil said, clearly trying to downplay the clear emotion in Logan’s tone, distantly wondering if he’d ever get used to seeing such emotional vulnerability in his friend, “What kind of help do ya need?” Logan blinked.

“I beg your pardon?”

“For the proposal,” Virgil clarified, “I’m sure you’re brewing some kind of plan as we speak. What can I help you with?” Virgil wasn’t wrong; a plan was beginning to form in his mind.

“Well,” Logan said, mind already teeming with ideas, “Since you offered, I was wondering…could you and Roman host a party?” Virgil scoffed.

“A _party_? What’re you on about, dude? You fucking hate parties.” 

“Be that as it may, Remus and I’s relationship began at you and Roman’s party nearly a year ago. I feel it would be a…pleasantly familiar atmosphere to propose to him in.” Logan could hear the gears in Virgil’s mind turning.

“Wow, Lo. I think that’s the sappiest thing I’ve ever heard you say.” Logan sputtered, feeling heat rise to his cheeks. “Hey, hey cool your jets, man,” Virgil said with a laugh, “I didn’t say no, just that it’s unexpectedly cheesy coming from you. I’ll ask Roman about it, though I’m sure he’ll say yes. He’s gonna think this is the cutest thing.”

“I – thank you, Virgil,” Logan breathed out, still feeling fairly flustered, “I sincerely appreciate it.”

“Sure man. Not too many people at the party, I assume?”

“Yes, I would prefer to keep it small.”

“Okay What’s the cover-story, then? Are we going to call it your guy’s One Year Anniversary party or something?” Logan considered it a moment. Doing anything else would surely arouse suspicions, and that would be strictly out of the question. But a party in honor of the milestone they’d reached in their relationship? That made sense.

“That… that sounds satisfactory,” Logan concluded, though Virgil could clearly hear how much more at ease he felt.

“Alright, man. I’ll let you know the details tomorrow. This is absolutely insane to think about, but I hope it goes great. If anyone could make it work, it’d be you two.”

“Thank you, Virgil, for everything you’ve done for me tonight. I appreciate it,” he choked out, “a great deal.”

“You’re welcome, L. Now I’m gonna let you go before this gets even more incredibly sappy.”

“Right, of course,” Logan said, remembering how late it was, “Goodnight, Virgil.”

“Night, man,” Virgil said before hanging up the phone and leaving Logan to process the conclusion he’d just come to.

Logan Sanders wanted to get married. Considering how he’d been behaving earlier in the evening, he should’ve been terrified by the prospect of wanting such a thing, and to some extent he certainly was, but he also felt so much calmer having decided to take this course of action. 

Despite everything, he believed in this, believed in the strength of his relationship. For the first time in his life, Logan saw a future for himself that was worth holding onto.

He poured out the mug of tea that had since gone cold and crawled back into bed. Remus grumbled sleepily beside him, throwing his arms around him and pulling him into a sleepy embrace, though he didn’t wake. Logan returned the embrace happily, aware of the fact that he’d most likely struggle to get back to sleep, but it didn’t matter. He held Remus as tightly as he could, engulfed in his plan.

=+=

“Princey, you are _not_ going to believe the conversation I just had,” Virgil announced loudly after he’d gotten off the phone, walking into their shared bedroom. Roman was sitting at the desk, probably rereading a script he had to prepare for that he’d long since memorized. Virgil decided it had been kind of a steal, finding a partner who was just as much of a night-owl as he was, though they’d both always be equally as tired in the morning.

“Who in their right mind was talking to you at this time of night?” Roman asked as if they weren’t currently still awake. Virgil belly-flopped onto the bed with more force than necessary, turning to face Roman who had since closed his laptop.

“So Logan calls me at one in the morning in a panic, right?” 

“Logan? What was the matter with pocket protector? A nightmare?” Virgil sat up on the bed, crossing his legs.

“See, that’s what I thought too, but he told me the dream he had wasn’t a nightmare. He said it was a really good dream – which was exactly why he’d woken up so frantically.” Roman arched an eyebrow.

“Why in the world would he wake up and call you about a _good_ dream?” Virgil couldn’t fight the smile his face broke out into if he wanted to.

“That’s the thing: he dreamed about him and Remus getting married.” Suddenly, Roman was on his feet with an incredulous look on his face.

“Oh my god! Are you serious?”

“I am! We talked it out a little bit, and then out of the blue, he was committed to the idea. He’s gonna fucking propose to your brother.” Roman couldn’t help but laugh.

“Oh my gosh, I just had a conversation with Remus today about how he wants to propose to Logan!”

“Are you fucking joking?!”

“I’m not!”

“That’s insane! So you’re telling me that Logan wants to propose to Remus… and Remus wants to propose to Logan...” 

“Apparently. _Oh_ , it completely slipped my mind! Remus requested that in two weeks we host a party –.” Virgil buried his face in his hands. “What’s the matter, love? You’re not keen on the idea?”

“No,” Virgil asked with a snicker, “No, it’s not that. It’s just, Logan just made the same request to me.”

“You…you cannot be serious,” Roman said, seeing how Virgil was still laughing, “Oh sweet heavens, you’re _serious_.”

“I am. Did you tell Remus this all seemed a bit fast?”

“I did. And I presume you told Logan the same.”

“Course I did. I couldn’t help it; I was just so surprised. But it looks like this is what both of them want.” Roman sat beside Virgil, taking his hand and squeezing it.

“I can’t believe they’re both planning on proposing to one another.” 

“Ditto,” Virgil said, his thumb tracing circles against Roman’s hand, “God, this is probably going to be such a mess.”

“Knowing those two, yes, yes it will,” Roman said, intent on more physical contact as he pulled Virgil into his lip, his head resting against the headboard. Virgil quickly accepted his new placement, sighing contently as Roman began to card a hand through his hair. “Even still, it’s so romantic, isn’t it?” Virgil sighed fondly.

“I knew you were gonna get all sappy,” he said teasingly.

“But it is, though,” Roman defended, “They want to propose to one another, both unaware that the other wants just the same.”

“I say it’d be a hell of a lot easier if somebody just told them.”

“Don’t you dare even _think_ of doing such a thing,” Roman said pointedly, “They’ve got to do this on their own.”

“I know, I know,” Virgil said, his lips curling into a smile as Roman massaged his scalp, “I’m not being serious. I mean, this out to be pretty damn entertaining, right?”

“I suppose so,” Roman said, though there was something far-off about his tone. Virgil pushed his hand out of his hair, despite how nice it felt, and positioned himself to make eye contact with his boyfriend.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Roman shook his head.

“Nothing’s wrong, my love.”

“Ro, c’mon, babe, you’ve got that wistful look in your eyes.”

“What look in my eye? I don’t know what you mean.”

“ _Roman_.” It took very little for Roman to crack under pressure, and Virgil saying his name like that was a surefire way to do it. 

“Okay, okay. I’ve been meaning to ask you for a while now…” Roman trails off, feeling his pule beginning to flutter.

“Hey, it’s alright. I’m listening,” Virgil encouraged softly. Roman nodded, determined to keep going.

“Right, well, I’ve been meaning to ask you your thoughts on marriage.” Roman could instantly feel the panic rising in his boyfriend. “I’m – I’m not proposing right now! I just wanted to know your feelings on the matter.” Virgil visibly began to relax.

“Well, as far as I’m concerned, getting married is the end goal.” A soft, hopeful smile graced Roman’s face.

“Yeah… yeah, me too. So if I was to, at some point, hypothetically, ask you to –.”

“I’d say yes,” Virgil assured, his voice brimming with emotion. Roman, utterly relieved, pulled his boyfriend into a kiss with far too much intensity for the time of night; neither men seemed to care.

“I love you so much, my dark prince,” he said pressing their foreheads together, his voice just above a whisper.

“I love you too, Ro,” Virgil promised, his heart swelling with unbridled emotion, “With all my damn heart.” 

That night two couples slept, both intent on marriage and both helplessly, hopelessly in love.

=+=

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was endlessly cheesy, but I'm sure you'd expect nothing less from this story. I'd love to hear what you thought of this chapter, and as always, have a wonderful day/night!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Patton and Janus have a good laugh about Remus and Logan's situation, while being very sappy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's some sweet, sweet mociet. I adore these two.

“Remind me why we agreed to this again?” Janus asked, his tone bitter. Patton, ever-the-optimist, took Janus’s hands in his own and squeezed tight.

“Because,” he said, his voice bright and chipper, “Remus and Logan are our friends and they’ve asked for our help.”

“Yes, well,” Janus struggled for a moment to recollect his thoughts much the way he usually did when Patton was holding his hand, “They asked for our help separately, so they can each buy engagement rings for _each other_.” Patton giggled at the absurdity of the situation they’d been thrust into.

“Exactly.”

“Patton, _darling_ , surely you see the humor in all this?” 

“Well, sure I do!” Patton admitted, “It’s a little silly to think about, but it’s also kinda sweet, right?” He asked, letting go of Janus’s hands and grabbing his coffee mug – the one with cats and dogs on it Janus had bought for him some time ago – and took a long sip.

“I suppose,” Janus said dryly, “Even so, it’s more than a little surprising. I never pegged Remus as the settle down-type in, well, _any_ of the time I’ve known him. And I’d never expected such boldness from Logan. Truly, those two continue to baffle me.”

“Maybe it’s a little surprising,” Patton said, sitting down at the kitchen table as Janus sat at the chair across from him, “But they make each other so gosh darn happy. They’re good for each other, Jan.”

“I never said they weren’t,” Janus defended lightly.

“I know you didn’t, sweetie pie. I’m just saying, we need to do this for them. We owe them that much.” Janus groaned softly, displeased with how much impact a well-placed term of endearment had on him. 

“You’re right,” he conceded, “Of course you’re right. Even so, I can’t help but think this is a hair-brained scheme that’s destined for disaster.”

“Oh, don’t be such a sour puss,” Patton chided, “Though, if that was what was to happen, would you be surprised?”

“No, I suppose not,” Janus admitted, taking a sip of his coffee before settling into some form of acceptance, “If you’d be so kind, could you remind me of the plan again?”

“If anyone asks, Logan and I are going to lunch together today while Remus is buying his engagement ring for Logan. Late, you and Remus are going to have a chat at our place while Logan buys his engagement ring for Remus.” Janus raised an eyebrow, already feeling an oncoming headache.

“So, you’re telling me neither of us will be seeing either of them today? We’re their cover-story?”

“Exactly,” Patton said, “In case they ask each other where they’ve been, they’ll say they were spending time with us separately and we’ll vouch for them.”

“And I suppose you’re alright with a lie in the name of love, but not when it benefits me?” Janus asked, his voice teasing. Patton swatted him across the table.

“Janny, lying about being sick so you could avoid a lunch date with my parents is a different story entirely!”

“I don’t know about entirely…” he grumbled irritably, but then Patton took his hand from under the table, the warm contact distracting him from his bitterness. 

“They like you fine, sweetheart,” he assured in the same way he’d done countless times before, “And even if they didn’t, it wouldn’t matter because I _love_ you.”

They’d had this conversation before and likely, they’d have it again. Patton’s parents were, to put it lightly, leaning more on the conservative spectrum. When Patton had come out as gay in his late teens their reactions had not been what he’d hoped for. At the time, there had been talk about possible disownment – Patton’s heart still clenched when he thought about it, how desperate he’d been, how desperate he _still_ was sometimes. But with time, they’d come around, at least a little bit more.

If you asked Janus, he’d say that Patton would be better off without them. His parents were holding him back, it seemed so _obvious_ , but it wasn’t Janus’s place to make that decision for his boyfriend, no matter how much he wanted to. He’d be there for him no matter what, even if that meant spending time with Mr. and Mrs. Hart – though that didn’t mean he’d do so without a complaint or two. It was obvious they despised Janus, but if they still made Patton even the least bit happy, then he’d stand by.

“I love you too,” he said, squeezing Patton’s hand.

“You know I don’t like lying if I can help it,” Patton pointed out.

Janus knew that well. It wasn’t as though Janus was advising he lie about absolutely everything, however, there were moments where a lie or two was necessary. Janus blamed a lot of Patton’s black-and-white thinking on his upbringing – though it took very little for him to want to push the blame onto Patton’s folks – he’d been able to break out of it a lot more recently. Janus was proud of how much of the strict way of thinking his boyfriend was questioning, but that didn’t negate from the fact that Patton still despised lying for the most part.

“I know you don’t, Angel.”

“But this is for a good cause,” he insisted, “Those boys love each other so much and if this is how they’re going about things, then we should help.”

“Such a good heart,” Janus said sweetly, looking at his boyfriend with utter admiration, that is to say, how he looked at him most of the time, “What’s a sweetheart like you doing with a guy like me, hm?”

“Don’t talk like that, Jan,” Patton said in a tone that reminded Janus heavily of a time where his boyfriend had threatened to “physically fight” Virgil when he said something negative about himself, “You’re wonderful.”

It was strange looking back on a time when he and Patton had not gotten along very much at all. It hadn’t helped that Janus and Virgil had before their being together been in a relationship that had faced a rather tempestuous end. Janus had a reputation of lying, one that at the time was not entirely untrue, so Patton had wearily kept his distance. 

But eventually, when things were smoothed over with Virgil for the most part and he found himself a comfortable spot in the friend group, Patton’s walls had begun to come down. With time, Janus found feelings emerging, feelings he didn’t comprehend could be reciprocated, but to his utter surprise, they were. 

Just as Janus had taught Patton that lying wasn’t altogether sinful, Patton had stopped Janus from fibbing as frequently. They helped each other, they made each other better, and neither man could be happier. 

Being in such a loving long-term relationship with him, Janus still found himself giving into self-doubt from time to time. He by no means believed his boyfriend to be perfect; that would be an incredibly unhealthy outlook on a partner. However, Janus found the good in Patton far easier than he did in himself. He didn’t think of himself as a bad man, per say, he was always trying to be better, always doing what he could to be a person Patton would be proud to call his, but he had his moments where he needed a gentle reminder of his worth, just as Patton needed the same from him from time to time. And they were always there to give that to each other.

“Patton, darling?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you promise you’ll be able to lie, should the need arise?” Patton worried his bottom lip, the look in his eyes indicating that no, he most likely would not be able to do so, at least not with any sort of guarantee.

“…yes?” A sigh rolled past Janus’s lips. The hesitance didn’t do wonders for his case, that was for sure.

“ _Patton,_ if you’ve committed to this you’ll have to do it if they ask about the other’s warbots.” 

“I can do it! I – I promise,” Patton said with a touch too much enthusiasm for it to sound confident. Janus quirked an eyebrow. “Or… at least I’ll try my hardest,” he said, softer. Janus smiled. 

“That’s all I can ask for, my love,” he said, praying Patton wouldn’t be asked any tough questions by their friends. 

While he was no longer as averse to lying as he had been in the best, that didn’t negate the fact that Patton was absolutely terrible at it. When Patton had first brought up the plan that he’d be lying on Logan’s account he’d been worried; and then Remus had called, asking Janus to lie for him as well because of _course_ , they were buying their engagement rings on the same day! Janus was sure he was going to have a brain aneurism if it turned out they were buying from the same jewelry store and ran into each other, but he really wouldn’t put it past those two. Even so, Patton had insisted that he could handle it and that, moreover, he’d made a commitment to a friend and he was sticking to it.

The couple spent the rest of the morning speaking of the fact that soon their friends would be engaged. It was more than a little to process, considering Logan’s reputation for intelligence as well as the fact that Janus knew damn well Remus was no idiot. Sure, he said stupid things quite often and acted impulsively, but to know they were both individuals who for the most part were rational, smart adults made the predicament all the more amusing. Sometimes it seemed like the pair had only one brain cell shared between them, and even then, it was reserved mostly for love and love alone.

Janus couldn’t say he was entirely shocked by the state of his friends, considering how he’d endeared himself to Patton and fallen for each and every one of his charms. There had been and would continue to be many a moment in which Janus was helpless to Patton making stupid puns or swiping a dollop of cookie dough over his nose, or him stealing all of the covers in the night, leaving Janus clinging to him for warmth as if he wouldn’t be doing the very same thing either way. Logan and Remus had gone soft for each other, but who was he to judge? After all, he’d lost his edge the moment he caught Patton’s eye.

=+=

Remus nearly shrieked in surprise when he came home to find that Logan had already gotten there before him. he’d anticipated having some time to himself to pace the jitters out, peak at the ring a few dozen more times, and memorize his speech a bit more, but it seemed that wasn’t in the cards.

“Hello, dear,” Logan had greeted from his spot at the table, his laptop open. Remus could only assume he was grading online work from his students. “How was your visit with Janus?”

For a moment Remus almost asked, stupid as ever, _“What visit with Janus?_ ” Before his sanity caught up with him.

“It was good,” he said, hoping Logan wouldn’t press any further. He removed his shoes, walking up to Logan, who’d since shut his laptop. Remus’s arms wrapped loosely around Logan’s neck as he pressed a kiss to his neck, “How was your lunch with Patton?” He noticed if only for a moment, Logan tense under his touch.

“It was satisfactory,” he said, “though the chicken in my salad was a bit dry.” Something about the sentence seemed off, but Remus couldn’t quite place it and leaving it be seemed the best thing to do, especially in his wired headspace.

“How positively dreadful,” he said, sarcasm heavy, “however will you go on?”

“Oh I’m sure I’ll manage, somehow,” Logan met his sarcastic tone, smiling softly as he stood to embrace Remus fully, slotting their mouths together in a kiss. “I love you,” he said against Remus's lips, more passion than usual swelling in his voice, “I love you dearly. I don’t think I’ll ever tire of saying it.”

“I love you too, and I’ll never tire of hearing it,” Remus replied after he’d drug Logan into another kiss, heated and prolonged, “you fucking sap.” Logan laughed lightly.

“No more than you are, dear.”

“Whatcha wanna do for dinner tonight, Dragonfly?” Remus asked, trying to tame the pent-up energy that rattled in his skull. He had a ring in his pocket right at that moment! He was going to propose to Logan in a few days! It was all too much to process, not in a bad way, but in a, hey my heart might explode with how much love it’s full of kind of way. The thought of a heart bursting open in someone’s chest came to mind; Remus would have to write that down.

“If I’m honest, I’m feeling exceptionally lazy,” Logan admitted. A smile spread over Remus’s face.

“Takeout?”

“That sounds wonderful.”

“What’re you in the mood for, Dragonfly?”

“Whatever you’d like, love. You choose.” Oh thank _god_ , this would give Remus a moment or two to get his thoughts in order.

“Pizza it is. Let me go call the place,” he said, quickly slinking into their bedroom. The moment the door was shut Remus was having to press a hand over his mouth to stop himself from squealing out of utter excitement. He slipped the ring box from his hoodie pocket, popping it open and admiring the stone. He’d searched the internet tirelessly for just the right ring, and he was certain he’d found it.

“I’m gonna marry the fuck out of you, Dragonfly,” he whispered aloud, sliding the box in the space under the nightstand, somewhere Logan would never find it and dialing the pizza place's number.

Little did Remus know, there was a second ring box hidden in the closet that had been put there mere minutes prior. 

=+=

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Goodness these boys are incompetent but it's okay because they're in love! Comments are really appreciated and as always, have a wonderful day/night!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Before the party, Remus freaks out, the weight of the situation finally catching up to him all at once. Luckily, Logan is there to comfort him, not that he's entirely sure what he's comforting him about.

To say that Remus was bouncing off the walls would be an exceptional understatement. It felt like every one of his internal organs might _burst_ from how excited he was. Tonight was the night. Tonight Remus was to ask his dragonfly to be his for forever. 

Excitement shouldn’t have been outweighed by nerves, at least that’s what he kept telling himself, but he couldn’t help the dread from creeping in if he wanted to, and he certainly wanted to. 

What if this was all too fast for Logan? The thought probably should’ve been considered far sooner, but Remus had gotten so lost in the planning and fantasy of everything he hadn’t really allowed himself to dwell on it. Sure, Logan said that he wasn’t opposed to the idea of marriage, but that didn’t necessarily mean he was eager to get engaged so quickly. 

UGH – this was stupid! Remus was already entirely sure of this; it would’ve been very foolish for him to purchase an engagement ring if he wasn’t. Logan loved him, despite every hesitation, he knew that Logan loved him. If things were really to go pear-shaped, and Logan didn’t want to get married yet, they’d surely be able to work things out. It might be embarrassing, but Remus knew he shouldn’t be fearing the end of their relationship on account of the fact that he was determined to have Logan by his side for the rest of his life.

Prior to the evening, Remus had been trying to get ahold of his emotions, but it was no easy task. Waking up beside his boyfriend on the one-year anniversary of their relationship was something that he couldn’t help but get emotional about. He’d woken up to see Logan’s sleeping face and promptly burst into tears.

If you’d have told Remus a year ago that he would be reduced to tears at the mere sight of his boyfriend, he would’ve laughed hysterically. What kind of lovesick fool would be so at the mercy of his emotions?

He was, apparently. Remus was well aware of the fact that he’d been forgone nearly since the moment he and Logan first kissed, but that didn’t stop him from being surprised by the strength of his feelings every time.

Logan had awoken to the sound, quickly asking Remus what the matter was before realizing that he was crying out of joy rather than sorrow.

“I’m sorry,” Remus said, wiping his eyes as Logan sat up beside him and slipped his glasses on, “I’m sorry, I’m a mess. I just… I _love you_ so fucking much, Dragonfly.”

Remus smiled as Logan pressed his lips to his, the embrace soft and so full of love.

“You don’t need to apologize,” Logan promised, pulling Remus against him and pressing another kiss into his hair, “You never need to apologize for your emotions. I love you too. Immensely.”

The sentiment was almost jarring, looking back on Logan’s past. For so much of his life, he had shunned emotions, banning them to the far-most corners of his mind. He hadn’t expected to find love, nor was it something he’d necessarily welcomed with open arms. But this? Remus? He would welcome him always for as long as he could so long as Remus would have him.

"A year,” Remus mussed after he managed to get a better grip on his emotions, “Best year I’ve had for damn long time.” 

“Me too,” Logan said, running his hands through Remus’s hair, mussed from sleep. They both know with absolute certainty that the last year had been the best of their entire lives, despite not saying so.

The rest of the morning and afternoon is spent in each other’s company, having a nice breakfast as well as going out to lunch later. They spend a great deal of time sitting on the couch watching Serial Killer documentaries, not something that’s typically seen as the most romantic activity, but something the couple loved to do together, nonetheless. 

By the time the evening rolled around Remus’s nerves were more shot than he thought was possible. 

_This is fine, there’s no reason to be so_ fucking _afraid_ , he reminded himself, though the thought provided little comfort. The party would be small (Just as Logan had suggested, not that Remus was aware of that) with only Patton, Janus, Virgil, Roman and a few other friends of the group, so it wasn’t as though he was going to be putting on some kind of a show in front a bunch of people. But even so, the thought of asking Logan to be his in front of anyone was suddenly twisting his stomach in knots.

It didn't make any sense; Remus loved attention, even from groups of people. Throughout his life, he’d done what he can to receive attention, good or otherwise, from anyone who’d give it. But now that he thought about it… that wasn't necessarily the case anymore, was it? 

Sure, as a writer, Remus’s day was made when someone complimented his work, and it’s not like he’d shut out positive attentiveness, but since being with Logan, he hasn’t sought it out like he used to. That was just it, wasn't it? He didn't need to go looking under every nook and cranny for someone to pay him any mind anymore, because he’d always be able to come home to someone who loved him unconditionally and who’d entertain his thoughts and feelings, no matter how bizarre. He didn't need to make a fool out of himself every chance he got because he had Logan, and his boyfriend was always there for him. 

Oh god. Was this a terrible idea? Not marrying Logan, that is because Remus was fairly sure that’s the best idea he’s ever had. But proposing in public? Would it be too much for Logan? What if he choked up? What if _everything_ went wrong? What if – 

“Love, are you alright?”

Remus stiffened, turning around to find Logan standing in the doorway of their bedroom. Remus had just been getting ready for the party. The dress code wasn't anything fancy, but it was a party in their honor and it would feel weird if he wasn’t dressed a little bit nicer than usual. He opted for black pants and a lime green dress shirt with darker green pinstripes. The color’s still pretty out there, just the way he liked it, but it’s formal enough that it isn’t quite as disastrous as the things Remus usually wore.

As for Logan, he was wearing a dress shirt too, rather than the polo shirt he usually dawned, also forgoing the tie for the evening. It was always a rare treat to see Logan without his tie, claiming it makes him look “less serious,” but if Remus was honest, and he usually was, he thought Logan looked stunning regardless. And god, he sure did look stunning that night. It could be all the mushy-gushy feelings clouding his mind, could be the nerves, too, but as far as Remus was concerned, he’d never looked more beautiful. 

There was a sparkle in Logan’s eyes he knew was unique to him, like a star that shone for Remus and Remus alone. Logan looked incredible, and so, so happy. But in the moment, he also looked a tad concerned, and for a second Remus’s mind lagged before he remembered he probably looked a bit of a frantic mess.

“I’m fine,” Remus assured, remembering he’d been in the middle of brushing his hair before his nerves had distracted him, picking up the brush again and combing it through his hair. He nearly cursed aloud when he realized his hand was shaking.

“You’re trembling,” Logan observed, stepping into the room and placing a hand on his shoulder, “Are you sure you’re alright?” 

For a moment, Remus wanted to say, _NO!_ Wanted to say _, Absolutely not! I’m going out of my mind with worry because all I want is to be with you forever but that’s a suddenly very terrifying notion because that’s a really,_ really _big question! And what if you say no? What if you aren’t ready? What if this is one of my worst ideas yet?_

Of course, Remus couldn’t say that. Instead, he set the brush aside and turning around to face Logan, placing a hand over his cheek, hoping it wasn’t shaking too terribly.

“You look amazing tonight. Not – that isn’t to say that you don’t _always_ look amazing. Because you do! All the time! I remember getting so distracted by you right before we started dating. I couldn’t help but stare. I –.” 

“Remus, dear, you’re rambling.” Remus blinked, seeing the worry in Logan’s expression deepen.

“I… I am?”

“You are. Now please tell me, honestly, are you okay?” Remus assessed his options for a moment, realizing there weren’t too many options available. Sighing, he hastily decided on a half-truth.

"I’m just… I’m nervous,” he admitted, voice uncharacteristically nervous, “Which I know is insanely stupid.” Logan shook his head.

“I never said it was.” 

“Yeah, well, it _is_. I mean, here we are, going to a party all about us, hosted by my brother and Virgil. Two really amazing people. And we’ve been together a year, and that’s great. I mean, it’s fucking amazing. Because I mean, look at you,” Remus gestured vaguely to all of Logan, “You’re incredible. You’re so smart and sweet and good to me. And you’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen or ever will see and I just…” Remus prayed he wouldn’t get misty-eyed again, at least not until later into the night, “I love you. I love you so fucking much, Dragonfly. And I don’t… I don’t know why I’m nervous,” – that’s a blatant lie, Remus knew exactly why he was nervous, “– “I just am.” 

Remus sighed as Logan wrapped his arms around him, pulling him into a tight embrace.

“It’s perfectly alright to feel nervous or overwhelmed right now,” Logan assured, smiling as Remus buried his face in his neck, “We’ve approached a momentous milestone in our relationship, and that can sometimes be quite a lot to process. I love you too, so, so much. It’s okay.”

“Your butt looks nice in those pants,” Remus mumbled into Logan’s neck, hoping he might be able to redirect the conversation.

“I’m afraid a comment about my posterior will not distract me from the topic at hand,” Logan said, his tone slightly more serious than before. Remus exhaled sharply, pulling away and meeting Logan’s gaze. “Being entirely honest… I find myself feeling somewhat nervous as well.” Remus cocked an eyebrow.

“ _What_? You are? But you don’t seem nervous at all.” (Logan had most certainly seemed nervous for the last two weeks, particularly so today. Remus was too lost in his own nerves to realize Logan was shaking nearly as much as he was)

“Yes, well, I am. It’s just as I said, there are a lot of factors at play and that can be nerve-racking. Regardless,” Logan said, taking Remus’s hands in his own, “I’m excited. Thrilled, if I’m entirely honest, to have had you in my life this past year and to have the opportunity to celebrate that with our friends. You, my love, have and continue to be a blessing that I was never expecting to receive. But I have, and I cherish that fact every day that I’m with you.” Remus hopped Logan didn’t have more to say because if so, he would’ve been interrupted with the suddenly ardent kiss Remus pressed to his lips, all but pinning him to the dresser.

“Well… that was certainly something…” Logan trailed off, his voice soft and awestricken as Remus kissed him again, fairly gentler this time.

“You can’t just make passionate love declarations like that and not expect me to kiss you senseless.”

“In that case,” Logan said, readjusting his hair from where Remus had raked a hand through it, “Perhaps I should do that more often.” Remus barked out a laugh.

“I certainly wouldn’t complain if you did!”

“Are you feeling better?” Logan asked, turning the topic away from passion, knowing they didn’t have the time for it considering the party was starting soon.

“I’m fine. Great. Fantastically and stupidly in love with you,” Remus declared vehemently, earning a bright smile from his nerd.

"All seems to be in order then,” Logan said, pressing a final kiss to Remus’s lips before pulling away, “We’re leaving in a few minutes, okay?”

“Sure thing, can’t wait,” Remus responded, watching as Logan walked out of the room. 

In all honesty, Remus’s nerves were still shot to hell. He was still nearly as anxious as he’d been prior, wondering distantly and irrationally, if he was making a mistake. But no matter, he’d made a commitment to this and he’d see it through no matter what. His nerves, though still incredibly present, also coexisted with the feelings of love and admiration that Logan’s word and instilled. 

As far as he was concerned, despite everything, this party was going to be amazing.

It’s a pity how wrong he was.

=+=

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nothing like ending on an angsty cliffhanger, am I right, folks? Comments are really appreciated because I love to hear what you think. See you in the next chapter and have a wonderful day/night!


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the night of the party and everything's going wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for mention of homophobia. This one's angsty, folks.

Everyone was already in attendance by the time Remus and Logan arrived. Virgil and Roman, of course, considering they were the hosts, Janus and Patton, as well as their friends Emile and Remy who Logan had known since college. It was a small group, which admittedly helped out with Logan’s anxiety that was currently going through the roof.

It was a strange thing to consider, thinking back on the fact that Logan had just helped Remus out with his own concerns about the party as well as their relationship and all of the things Logan was under the impression went unsaid. It seemed like there was more to Remus’s nervousness than he’d admitted, but lost in his own anxieties, he didn’t have the brainpower to dwell on it.

It was more than a little jarring, walking back into the house that night. Nothing has changed about it since a year ago, of course. But so much else had changed, so much was _going_ to change that night. Both men hoped they could get through it without collapsing considering how high-strung they both currently were. 

“Well if it isn’t the guests of honor,” Roman greeted boisterously as he opened the door for them, a broad smile on his face. 

“Good evening Roman, Virgil,” Logan said, acknowledging the emo who stood at Roman’s side, smiling as well, if not a bit too forcefully. Good lord, Logan prayed these two didn’t give his plan away.

“Hiya Bro-Bro,” Remus said as they entered the house, “What’s up, Virge? Still hanging around this loser?” He asked, gesturing to his brother. Roman slapped a hand over his chest, gasping defiantly. 

“I beg your pardon?!” Virgil only laughed.

“Yeah, he keeps me pretty well entertained, don’t you, princey?” Roman grumbled something inaudible under his breath. “Still hanging around that nerd?” Logan rolled his eyes as Remus threw an arm around his shoulder and pulled him close so that they were hip-to-hip.

“And I wouldn’t trade him for the world.”

“Well, are we going to stand in the foyer all night or are we gonna take this outside?” Roman asked, crossing his arms over his chest. Even despite being teased a mere few seconds ago, he couldn’t shake that grin if he tried. 

“Then, by all means, lead the way,” Logan said, lacing his fingers with Remus’s and following as Virgil and Roman lead them out onto the patio. The weight of the situation hit full force as they stepped outside, seeing all of their friends who greeted and congratulated him and Remus warmly. While he’d been hyping himself up for this moment for the last two weeks, now that it was actually upon him, Logan was more than a little out of his depth. In fact, he was feeling a bit like he was going to be sick.

It wasn’t as though this wasn’t exactly what Logan wanted; it was, it really, _really_ was. All he wanted at the end of the day was to be with Remus for the rest of his life, but that couldn’t take away the fear that had latched itself onto him. 

Logan had a speech planned out; one he’d rehearsed tirelessly. He’d double and triple checked that he had the ring on him and gone through the plan in his head again and again. He was going to do it after everyone had eaten dinner and the chatter had died down a bit. He’d raise a toast to Remus and their relationship thus-far, something that would already be expected of him considering the circumstances, before he’d drop to one knee and ask Remus to be his for forever. It was one of the cheesier ideas he’d had in all honesty, but Logan couldn’t bring himself to care. This was his happy ending, and he was seizing it.

So why was he so _goddamn_ nervous?

Glancing at Remus, his boyfriend didn’t seem much better. His hand clasped in Logan’s was clammy and there was a nervousness to his smile that Logan couldn’t entirely account for, which was odd, considering how much better Remus had seemed right before they left. 

“Hey, is everything alright?” Logan asked quietly, sitting beside Remus on one of the benches on the patio. Remus paused his bouncing knee, facing him with a smile that was all too forced. Logan could certainly relate.

“Me? Everything’s fine,” Remus said quickly, turning in Patton’s direction who was currently chatting with Remy, “Hey, Pat? You on grill duty tonight?” Patton grinned sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck.

“No, that’s Jan’s job. I’ve kinda been… banned from grilling since y’ know…”

“You nearly set our balcony on fire last time you tried to grill?” Janus supplied as he walked over and placed a hand on Patton’s back. 

“What can I say? I’m pretty _flame_ ous for not being the best cook,” Patton said, earning a light-hearted groan from all those around him.

“Patton, babe, how many of those puns you got?” Remy asked. Logan sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“ _No_ – no don’t get him started.” Patton’s smile broadened. 

“Well, I dunno, Remy. I lack a buf _fire_ when it comes to puns.” Janus did his best to hide the smile on his face, but to no avail, meanwhile, Remy was openly chuckling. “Avert your _blaze_ if you don’t want to hear more of my absolute _fire_ puns.” Logan placed his hands over his face, now thoroughly distracted from Remus’s odd behavior. 

“Remus, dear, please kill me. End my suffering.” Patton laughed.

“Aw, I wouldn’t want you to suf _fire_ , Lo.”

“I think that’s quite enough, for now, Angel,” Janus said, intervening gently, “We wouldn’t want to further upset the dear _extinguished_ guest of honor.” 

Logan whined.

“Oh _god_ , sometimes I forget that you’re nearly as bad as he is, Janus,” he said, turning to Remus before he could even open his mouth, “I swear if you make a pun right now, I _will_ scream.” Remy snickered.

“Well, I think you’re a riot, Pat. I’m used to puns at home as it is, ain’t that right, babes?” He asked his sweater-vest-fairing husband who now stood beside him and wrapped an arm around his waist. 

“Sure is!" He said before gesturing to the couple, "So, a year, huh? That’s a pretty exciting milestone.” Remy sighed fairly dramatically, but nothing that was out of the ordinary for him.

“Babe, I _swear_ , if you talk about work right now, I’m gonna go ballistic.” Emile chuckled fondly, shaking his head.

“No one said anything about talking about work right now, but I am curious, you two, as to which fusion you’d say best encapsulates your relationship?”

Emile said something after that, but by that point, Logan’s mind was occupied only with fear. Everyone’s words were melding together, so much so that Logan could hardly tell who was talking. It took Remus shaking his shoulder, somewhat forcefully, before he finally snapped out of it.

“Dragonfly? Hey, are you good? You okay? I kept saying your name, but you weren’t answering.” Logan felt heat rise to his face. How long had the others been trying to get his attention? How could he be so lost in his terror-filled thoughts? Good lord, how was he ever going to escape this night in one piece? 

“My apologies,” Logan said, hoping he wouldn’t be further questioned, “It seems I was lost in my thoughts. What were we discussing?”

The conversation continued, somehow, without being derailed too much. But Logan doesn’t miss the fact that Remus is squeezing his hand just a little too tight, sticking even closer to him than he usually did. Remus knew something was wrong, god, of course, he did. But simultaneously, Remus was clearly distressed as well. How could everything feel so wrong? 

Janus grilled up the hot dogs and hamburgers, the friends all chatting amongst themselves. Logan was far too mindful of the knowing looks in Virgil and Roman’s eyes like they were seconds from cracking under the impression and confessing that Logan was going to propose. They wouldn’t, of course, they were too good of friends to do so, but the fear wouldn’t leave Logan’s mind, no matter how much he tried to banish it. 

Patton knew too, considering he’d needed to lie and say he was spending time with him, and if Patton knew then surely Janus did as well. He hadn’t considered it before, the pressure all of these people knowing held, all of those eyes on him. This was supposed to be a celebration, a momentous occasion on which Logan would ask Remus for his hand. Now, though? The party felt like torture, a punishment he realized was self-inflicted. This was what Logan _wanted_ , why couldn’t he be happy with it? Why did Remus seem so upset? Everything swirled together in his mind until almost nothing made sense. 

By the time everyone had finished their dinner and the chatter had died down somewhat, Logan realized this was his cue. This was the moment he’d been waiting for. But searching through his mind, the speech he’d memorized perfectly fell to pieces. Fractures of sentences remained sensical – _light of my life, best surprise I’ve yet to receive, love, I want you forever, want, want,_ **want** _._ It was nothing concrete, just gaps in between the full scope of what he wanted to express. He searched, _damn it_ , he searched, but he couldn’t find it. Panic bubbled, swelling with each breath.

And then Remus let go of his hand.

“Logan…” there was deep hesitation in his voice, flickering nervously. Any conversation between the others silenced, “Dragonfly, there’s… there’s something that I –.” Remus cuts off when the sound of a cellphone ringing rippled through the tension. 

All eyes landed on Patton who smiled sheepishly, muttering about how he thought he’d silenced his phone. But then he registered who was calling and a serious, almost scared look settled over his face.

“I’m so, so sorry you guys! It’s – it’s my mom. I’ll just be a second, keep doing whatever you were doing without me! I’m sorry!” He said quickly, walking back into the house and putting the phone to his ear as he answered and shut the door behind him. Logan turned to Remus, feeling nothing but cowardice. He just couldn’t do it. Not now, not with everyone’s eyes on him, not when everything had gone so off course.

“Do you want to continue what you were saying, love?” He asked, hoping the tone of his voice didn’t convey the deep-seated disappointment. Not in Remus, _never_ Remus, and certainly not Patton either. It was a disappointment in himself. Remus shook his head, a wide, indescribably strange look in his eyes.

“No I’ll – I’m just gonna wait until Pat comes back.” Silence settled over the group, tense and thick and terrible. Remy spoke up, God forgive him.

“So… is something like up with Patton’s mom or something?” Concern shone in Janus’s eyes, though it looked like he was trying to keep it at bay.

“Patton’s parents are fairly conservatives and there have been… altercations in the past.” Emile rose an eyebrow.

“Altercations?” Janus nodded, gritting his teeth.

“Yes. To be blunt, time and time again they’ve been cruel to Patton and were very unaccepting when he came out. They’re still not very good about it and I’m doubting how much progress they’ve made.” Emile frowned.

“Well, that certainly doesn’t sound healthy at all.” Janus bit his lip.

“It’s not. In the least bit.” Remy shrunk back.

“Jeez, sorry I asked…”

Roman and Virgil shared uncomfortable glances, looking at Remus and Logan and back to each other. It was obvious what was about to happen, but now things were looking iffy, to say the least. Logan looked like he was about to pass out, Remus didn’t look much better, and the rigidity of the atmosphere was tight and constricting. Hopefully, Patton would return in a few minutes and everything would work out like a fairytale.

Unfortunately, it seemed that was not to be. Patton emerged from the house; utter horror written all over his face. His phone was still held limp in his hand. He blinked, and there were tears in his eyes. Janus was on his feet in seconds. 

“Patton? Angel, what’s wrong? What happened?” Janus asked, almost frantically, placing a hand on his lover’s shoulder. Tears ran down his cheeks.

“She… she said…” Patton hiccupped, his breath hitching. Janus already looked like he was going to burst into flames with anger. “She said they’re done.”

“ _Done_? What do you mean done? Pat, honey –.”

“They – they thought it was a phase. They thought I – I was gonna get it out of my system and I’d marry s-some girl someday. _Janus_ …” Patton let out a sob, the sound heartbreakingly raw, “S-she told me if I don’t – if I don’t leave you that I can’t go back home. I c-can’t go back home. Janny, I _can’t_ – I c-can’t –.”

The moment Janus’s arms were thrown around him, Patton collapsed against him, fisting his hands in his shirt and sobbing loud and broken into his chest. Janus whispered to him, rubbing circles into his back as they stood, watched by their friends who had no clue what to say. What could possibly make this better?

“I – I’m sorry, Remus, L-Lo,” Patton muttered through his tears, pulling away from Janus for a moment, “T-this was supposed to be your n-night and _I_ ruined it. ‘M sorry. I’m s-so sorry.” For a moment, Logan found his voice.

“It’s alright,” he said from where he was seated, not daring to stand with them, “You don’t need to apologize, you didn't ruin anything. I can’t express how sorry I am, Patton.” The others provided their own apologies, their own condolences. 

“We’re going home,” Janus said, holding Patton close to him as he cried, “I apologize for leaving so early, but I need to –.” Remus shook his head.

“ _Go_. Take care of him, it’s okay.” It wasn’t okay. _Nothing_ was okay. It wasn’t anything close to Patton’s fault, it was never a child’s fault when their parents were so, so cruel. Patton had held onto his strained relationship with them but now they were cutting that chord. They did so at the absolute worst time, but it had happened. Logan could do nothing but feel sorry for Patton, and then feel guilty for feeling so sorry for himself. If he hadn’t been such a coward if he’d only managed to get the worst out. If only.

After Janus took a sobbing Patton to the car and they’d driven off, the party was promptly ended. No one could stay, not after that. 

Logan lingered in a hug with Virgil as they parted ways, hearing the way his friend whispered: “I’m sorry.” That’s all this night was. Far too many “I’m Sorry’s”. 

Remus and Logan drove home in silence, the quiet following them to their bed. Logan meant to ask Remus what it was that he was going to ask, but he simply didn’t have the energy. They said very little to one another as they lay beside one another, not tangled in an embrace like usual. The gap between them was small, but as far as Logan was concerned, it was an insurmountable gap. He didn’t have any clue how to get across. 

He shut his eyes, praying for sleep to take him away from this night, from the guilt and cowardice that he felt. 

Just like his speech, Logan failed to find it.

=+=

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That sure was angsty, huh? Oopsie. Seriously though, the next chapter isn't going to be nearly as emotionally drained, so stay tuned!


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for homophobia/mention of homophobic parents as well as what can be considered a brief mention to religion, but it's nothing too specific

Remus woke suddenly. Not in a jarring way, but merely an abrupt return to consciousness, an odd thing considering he was usually such a heavy sleeper. It was a Sunday, one he’d anticipated would be spent celebrating their engagement, but alas. 

He certainly hadn’t slept well, not that it seemed Logan had fared much better. His boyfriend had tossed and turned beside him all night, just a touch away, yet they hadn’t held each other. Remus blamed it on the sour taste in his mouth left from, well, _everything_ that had happened last night.

He’d been moments away from proposing to Logan before Patton’s phone had rung and everything came crashing down. But if he was honest with himself, and he always was, things had seemed off even before then. Remus had been nervous, understandably so, but Logan had seemed upset too. He’d been spaced out and noticeably agitated, and Remus couldn’t explain it. He hadn’t had the chance to ask, either, not after what had happened to Patton and the party’s abrupt end.

Remus had known, vaguely, of the complication in Patton’s relationship with his parents. He hadn’t been Patton’s friend long, not till after the accident and Logan’s admission to their relationship when he’d been welcomed into the friend group. Those moments from mere months ago felt like they’d occurred forever ago; he felt as though he’d been friends with Patton and the others far longer than he had. 

Patton could be a bit much sometimes, with his happy, peppy personality and nonstop puns as well as some of his more deep-seated black and white beliefs. But that didn’t stop Remus and Patton from getting along for the most part. Patton would laugh at some of Remus’s more inappropriate jokes if a bit uncomfortably. He’d even offered to read one of Remus’s books; Janus told him in private how it had given him nightmares and he hadn’t been sure if he should be proud of sad to have upset him. The point was, Patton was one of the kindest, most loving people Remus had ever known, and yet his parents were throwing him away like he meant nothing.

Remus could certainly relate to that sentiment.

He avoided thinking about his upbringing as much as he could, but repressing the memories did little good. To put it lightly, Remus’s parents were complete assholes. Always had been, always would be, as far as he was concerned. Remus was surprised it took into early adulthood for them to officially disown him and Roman, considering how much Remus had pushed their patience. He’d never been good at hiding things about himself, even when it was in his best interest to do so, and as such, Remus had done little to cover up his bisexuality. 

Roman was the one who did pretending the best, but he supposed that was expected of an actor. Roman had multiple girlfriends throughout high school, going through the whole song and dance of it. Remus had simply never had the energy for the charade. He didn’t blame Roman for doing it; their parents were brutal, desperate to push “salvation” upon them, doing everything their power to raise the sons they wanted. It was tough, looking back on those instances when Roman was the only other person he had, and even then, their relationship was in pretty rough shape. It wasn’t now, though. Sometimes he forgot how good things were, that it wasn’t some kind of idealistic dream.

It had taken Remus nearly dying for a resolution to form between the brothers. That hurt to remember. He didn’t put blame on Roman for the way things had been, at least not anymore. It was both of their faults, and what mattered was the change they’d undergone. Even if they continued to bicker fairly frequently, the twins made a good team.

Remus hadn’t tried to make bargains with his parents. From a fairly early age, he’d known that someday they simply wouldn’t be in his life. That was an incredibly heart-wrenching conclusion for a child to come to, and sometimes he wondered how long Roman had known the same thing. Roman came out after Remus did, claiming offhandedly that Remus had inspired the courage, and that, it seemed, had been the final straw. There was no more respect left in their hearts, no more love. They were disowned shortly after, only in contact with a handful of relatives after the explosive outcome. 

So, to think of how hard Patton had fought to keep his folks in his life, how he’d sacrificed so much for nothing; well, it just broke Remus’s heart in two. 

Remus sighed, turning over in bed to see Logan blinking awake. Some strange discomfort swelled in him.

“Morning, Dragonfly. How’d you sleep?” He knew the answer wasn’t going to be good, considering the circles under Logan’s eyes as well as how much he’d tossed and turned last night. Logan scrubbed a hand over his face before sitting up and sliding his glasses over his face.

“Poorly,” he said, voice bitter, “Last night certainly was…” He trailed off.

“An utter _fucking_ disaster?” Remus supplied. Logan hummed in response.

“Yes, that. I feel horrible for Patton. I can’t imagine a parent –.” Logan cut himself off, seeming to suddenly remember Remus’s backstory. “I apologize, I – I didn’t mean to –.”

“Hey, it’s okay,” Remus said reassuringly, despite how much everything didn’t _feel_ okay, “My parents are dicks. It’s crazy to think about any parent doing that. It’s an expected reaction of you to wonder how a parent could do that to their kid.”

Logan was thankful enough to have been graced with incredibly accepting parents, ones who had never so much as questioned Logan’s identity when he came out as gay. Logan recognized that he was in a lucky position in that regard, but it didn’t stop him from slipping up from time to time and forgetting that wasn’t the case for so many less fortunate queer people. 

“How do you think he’s holding up?” Logan asked, fearing what the answer might be. Remus sighed.

“I dunno. Not good, I’m sure Jan’s doing what he can to help, but not good.” Logan nodded sadly.

“That’s what I’d assumed.” Silence fell over the couple for a moment, unbearably heavy as they sat beside one another in bed before Logan spoke up again. “Is it hard?” Remus quirked an eyebrow.

“Is what hard?” Remus would’ve slipped in an inappropriate joke if he had the energy.

“Being reminded of your parents,” Logan said, somewhat hesitantly, “I would imagine that must be… difficult.” Logan was trying to handle this delicately, _goddamn_ was he trying, but it didn’t take away from the clumsiness of his attempt. Remus appreciated it regardless.

“It can be,” Remus replied honestly after a moment of contemplation, “I try not to think about it too much, y’ know?” Logan nodded. He didn’t know, not really, but he got the gist of it. “My teenage years were a blur. I’m kinda glad I didn’t know you then, you wouldn’t have liked me back then.” 

“I’m sure that isn’t –.”

“No, it’s true. _I_ didn’t even like me back then. I was just so fucking angry all the time. Home was a nightmare and I was constantly reminded of how “sinful” I was on account of my sexuality and all that shit. Roman was good at pretending to be straight, but I guess I was just never cut out for it. I’m just me, regardless of whatever anyone else thinks.” Remus’s breath hitched as Logan pressed a hand into his own, giving it a gentle squeeze.

“I’m _glad_ you’re you, love. You’re one of the most genuine people I’ve ever come across, that’s a very admirable trait.” 

“Yeah, well, I also used to be a major asshole. _More_ of an asshole, anyway.”

“You are by no means an asshole. As far as I’m concerned, you’re the sweetest person I know.” A smile flickered across Remus’s face. Even despite how heavy and horrible everything felt, Logan always had a way of making him feel better, at least a little bit.

“Only for you, Dragonfly. Anyway, I was an angsty teen with a fucked up home life and a strained relationship with one of the only close people in my life. I was fucking awful at making friends, but just terrific at scaring people away. I… well, I thought that’s what I was going to do with you, at first. Scare you away.” There was a rawness to Remus’s tone that he hadn’t intended, and he ducked his head, eyes trained on the bedsheets. “Jeez, sorry to be such a fucking downer. I’m just thinking about Pat, and my folks and all that shit…”

“Remus,” Logan’s voice wavered with sincerity, earning Remus’s full attention as their eyes met once more, “You _never_ need to apologize for something like that. You don’t need to apologize for your vulnerabilities. It's okay.” Remus’s head swam with a cocktail of different emotions as he threw his arms around Logan and held on tight. There was still something tense and strange in the embrace, but Logan was solid and warm and always such a good source of comfort.

“Jesus, I love you,” he said, voice uncharacteristically soft, “You mean fucking everything to me, you know that right?”

“And you mean the same to me,” Logan responded, still embracing Remus tightly. “I love you too, dear. Immensely.”

It was no secret that both men were working on being more open and vulnerable with one another. They loved each other to the moon and back, but that didn’t hinder the fact that they both had issues with opening up and exposing their most primordial, raw emotions. Still, they were making progress together, doing everything they could to be better for each other and for themselves. 

“God, I feel really fucking bad for Pat,” Remus said as they pulled away, “He’s such a sweetheart and to know what he’s going through…” Remus trailed off sadly. Then, Logan had an idea.

“What if someone visited him?” Remus raised an eyebrow.

“Do you think that’s a good idea? That might be kinda overwhelming.”

“Do you think Roman would be interested in visiting him as well?” 

“I mean, I’m sure he would, but what’re you talking about?”

“You and Roman both have experience with that Patton’s going through. I feel as though you two spending some time with him would do a great deal of good.”

“And you wouldn’t want to come too?” Logan shook his head.

“It isn’t that. I love Patton, he’s an incredibly dear friend, and I’m going to do everything in my power to support him during this time. But as I said, this is a situation you and Roman know well. If the idea makes you too uncomfortable, then, by all means, I’ll drop the issue. I just feel as though you two could offer him some very good support.” 

Remus considered it for a moment. Prior he thought that perhaps approaching Patton so early on might be a bad call, but now that he thought about it, Logan made a compelling case.

“You know what, yeah… yeah, I think you’re right. Let me text Jan and ask how Pat’s doing and then ask Roman if he could help out,” Remus said, standing up from bed and grabbing his phone. 

Remus came back into the bedroom after a few minutes, still holding his cellphone.

“Janus said I can head over anytime.” Logan nodded, thankful that at the very least, Patton was accepting the company.

“How’s he holding up?” Remus's lip tugged into a frown.

“Not too good, from the sounds of things. Are you sure you don’t want to come too? I’m sure Patton would appreciate it.”

“I promise I’ll come next time, but for now, I want to leave this to you two. I know he’ll be in excellent hands. Can Roman attend?” Remus nodded, sitting back down on the bed.

“Yeah, he’s on his way now.” Logan pressed a kiss to Remus’s cheek, holding a hand against his face for a moment.

“Then you’d better get going.”

“You really think we’re gonna be able to help? I mean… he’s so upset, and I don’t want to make things worse…”

“Nonsense. You’ve got this, love. I know you do. You and Roman are going to do so much good.” Remus pulled Logan into a final hug, one that finally lacked the unexplainable burning sensation of all of their previous interactions since the party, and parted feeling far more hopeful then he’d started the day out with. 

“Thanks, Dragonfly. Okay, I’m gonna get going.” It was still odd to think about all that Remus had thought this day would be. He’d expected celebration, overindulgence, and morning sex, not a friend dealing with so much strife. No matter, that was the situation, and Remus would have to do his best to make things better. He grabbed a granola bar and a cup of coffee on the way out, doing everything he could to cling to hopefulness.

In the past, Remus had never thought of himself as someone who was suited for comforting people, as far as he was concerned, he just wasn’t built for it. Since his time with Logan, though, Remus had come to realize that wasn’t entirely the case. The fear that he might still somehow make things worse burned in his chest, but it was alongside the hope that Logan had instilled as well as the knowledge he’d have his brother’s help. Alone, maybe Remus wouldn’t be able to brighten Patton’s spirits. But he wasn’t going to be on his own. Roman had always been good at soothing others, even at the expense of himself at times, and he was a good person to have in his corner. 

There was no doubt all of this was going to continue to remind Remus and Roman of their childhood, but for now, he pushed the thought aside. What mattered now was helping Patton, and he was going to try his damndest.

=+=

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to be entirely honest, I expected this fic to be eight chapters at the most and yet here we are, not finished lol. I promise I'm not gonna drag it on too terribly long, but I'm pretty happy with things are going. I hope you enjoyed, comments are always so, so appreciated. Have a great day/night!


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remus and Roman do what they can to comfort Patton. Tears are shed, emotions run high, and Remus realizes, among other things, that he is fully capable of comforting his friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for homophobia, talk of homophobic parents

Remus couldn’t help but feel like a fish out of water, sitting in his car in front of Janus and Patton’s apartment complex, waiting for Roman to arrive. That had always been a very striking metaphor to him; the idea of a fish flopping around on dry land, desperate for water it can no longer reach, drowning on oxygen. It was something that would usually amuse him quite a bit. It didn’t now.

Comforting was a word very few people would use to describe Remus. Crude? Yes. Intrusive, impulsive, and strange? Oh, absolutely. But _comforting_? Logan might use such a descriptor, but that was only because he saw such a gentle side of the writer. Remus hadn’t always been the best at dealing with his own shit, so the issues of those close to him were something he was no expert with. In fact, he handled such issues with no poise at all, as far as he was concerned. 

There had been many instances in which Logan had assured him that he’d made him feel better and provided him solace, but that was different. Remus was soft with Logan by default, something he’d never really known how to be with other people. 

So, yeah, he could comfort Logan most of the time without panicking. But Patton? He wasn’t so sure. 

Remus was thankful to have his panicking interrupted when he heard a tap on the car window and turned to see Roman on the other side with a grocery bag in hand. Remus opened the door and stepped out.

“Hey bro,” Remus said, knowing instantly how deflated his voice sounded. Remus set his bag on the pavement, scooping Roman into a tight hug. For a moment, Remus was thrown off before simply sinking into the embrace of his twin, knowing he was trembling just slightly.

“Hey, how are you doing?” It felt wrong to be asked that, all things considered, but Remus supposed it made sense. Roman had been expecting him to be an engaged man by today just as much as he had.

“I’m fine,” Remus lied, poorly, but Roman was hardly in a position to argue against him, “Don’t worry about me right now.”

“Virgil and I would be more than happy to do a redo party later if you want. I know you came so close to… well, it just feels like you got so cheated out of your fairytale ending and I’m sorry,” Roman said as he pulled away. Remus shook his head, touched by his brother’s offer, nonetheless.

“Like I said, man, let’s not worry about me right now. And I couldn’t ask that of you again; it isn’t your guys’ fault. So,” Remus said, the image of a fish out of water still persistent in his mind, a goldfish that leaped out of its tank only to die writhing on the carpet, “What’s in the bag?”

“Cookies, ice cream, all kinds of goodies,” Roman explained, picking the paper bag up off the floor, “I dunno, I figured a little junk food couldn’t hurt right now.” Remus nodded approvingly. 

“Good call.” Concern flashed in Roman’s eyes. Remus cursed himself silently; absolutely _everything_ about him was probably giving away how nervous he felt.

“Are you ready for this?” Remus wanted to say yes with the utmost confidence. He _wanted_ to assure him that he was more than prepared for whatever this might entail, but that would be a blatant lie.

“No,” he said, shaking his head. The worry in Roman’s eyes deepened. “No, I’m not cut out for this shit at all, making people feel better and all that. But… I’m gonna _try_. Logan encouraged this and if he says I can do this, then fuck it, I’m just gonna hope he’s right. He usually is.”

“Oh, Remus,” Roman said, his voice too soft for Remus’s liking, too kind, “Of _course_ you can be comforting. You’re rough around the edges, and a real pain in the ass sometimes, but that doesn’t make you a bad friend. And you aren’t alone, either. We’ve got this, _both_ of us.” 

Roman said it with such confidence, as though it was obvious that Remus would be able to handle this. Remus couldn’t tell if his brother was really that proficient of an actor that a lie could come out so believable, or if he meant it with the utmost sincerity. Remus sincerely hoped it was the second option. He took a deep breath, nodding, not so much in agreement, but more of a hope that one day he’d be able to agree.

“I hope you’re right. Think this is gonna stir up some shitty childhood memories?” Remus already knew the answer, but that didn’t stop him from asking. Roman shuddered.

“Oh, _definitely_. This is gonna suck, a lot. But Patton’s our friend, and we owe it to him to be there for him, no matter how bittery, jittery, and less-than-glittery it makes us feel.” Despite the nonchalance he presented, there was fear in Roman’s voice, a kind Remus hadn’t heard from him in such a long time. It was scary, realizing even Roman, the greatest pretender he knew, couldn’t hide how horrible everything felt. At the same time, knowing he felt the same provided Remus very much some twisted sense of comfort. He wasn’t alone, not at all, and together they were going to try their best to get through this. 

The twins walked up to the door together, shuffling anxiously once Remus had rapped on the door. It opened, revealing Janus whose eyes shone with relief when he caught sight of them.

“Thank you two so much for coming,” he said, not an ounce of his usual sarcasm in his tone. Neither twin had ever seen Janus in such a state, looking so tired and so, _so_ worried. Patton brought out a much softer side in him then he cared to expose, and at this point, he didn’t know how to shut it off. Patton was Janus’s angel, and his angel was in worse shape than he’d been in a very long time, something that Janus couldn’t miraculously fix, no matter how much he desperately wanted to.

“How’s he doing?” Roman whispered as they walked into the apartment, not sure how near Patton was and not wanting him to hear them talking about him. Janus shook his head, running a hand along the side of his face, the side with the jagged scar he’d had since he was a kid that Remus couldn’t recall the origin of. If it weren’t such a somber instance, he might’ve flipped his shirt up and pointed at his own marring, saying “EH, scar buds!” Needless to say, he didn’t do that.

“He’s devastated, of course,” Janus said with a sigh, matching Roman’s quiet volume, “I’ve never seen him so sad. I… I just don’t know what to say. I want to fix this for him, so much. More than anything, I want to give those sorry excuses for parents **_a piece of my mind_** ,” Janus’s voice swelled with anger, the first spark of a fire that was sure to burn the apartment complex to the ground. Even so, the flames receded as quickly as they’d appeared as he shook his head, “But I know that wouldn’t do any good.”

“No,” Remus agreed sadly, “It really wouldn’t. I know the feeling, but at the end of the day, it makes things a lot worse.” Janus exhaled sharply, eyes landing on the grocery bag.

“What’s in the bag?”

“Some sweets,” Roman explained, handing it over, “I know it’s a little early for ice cream and cookies, but I figured it might cheer him up, at least a little bit.” A fracture of a smile interrupted Janus’s troubled features, though only for a moment. 

“Thank you, Roman,” he said, “That was kind of you. Thank you _both_ ; I can’t express how thankful I am that you’ve offered to be here.”

“Of course,” Remus said, trying his hardest not to think of the goldfish.

“Where’s Pat?” Janus pointed in the direction of the living room. 

“I’m sure you already know, but he’s very fragile right now. I know I’m probably being overprotective of him, but he –.”

“Hey,” Roman interrupted, his voice understanding and gentle, “It’s _okay_ , Janus. We’ll go easy on him, promise. We just want to help.” That seemed to ease the tension in Janus’s shoulders somewhat as he nodded. Slowly, he walked into the living room and the twins followed behind him. 

Patton was sitting on the sofa, a tissue box nearby that looked to have been almost completely used. He was wearing his Cat onesie instead of his usual polo shirt and cardigan, a sight that would usually be a joyous one. Patton loved to have everyone over for movie nights, insisting that they all wear onesies, which made it very reminiscent of sleepovers. Now, though, it was nothing more than a weak attempt at comforting himself. The sparkle in Patton’s eyes was replaced with dull, horrible heartbreak, and his cheeks were streaked with tear-tracks. 

“Roman and Remus are here, Angel,” Janus said, his voice achingly soft as he pressed a kiss to Patton’s cheek. Patton looked at the twins standing in the doorway, the expression on his face impossibly sad.

“Hi, Roman… Remus. Sorry… I’m not feeling very much like myself,” Patton said slowly. His voice was so raw it made Remus think of someone swallowing shards of glass, cutting their way down his esophagus. He did his best to shake the thought from his mind.

“That’s okay, Pat,” Roman said, sitting down on Patton’s left side. Hesitantly, Remus sunk into the sofa on Patton’s right.

“I’m going to leave you boys, to it, but I’ll bring snacks out later,” Janus said hesitantly, looking like he wanted nothing than to stay glued to Patton’s side for the rest of time. Despite that impulse, he also knew he needed to give them space.

“Okay, Janny,” Patton said, watching as Janus disappeared into the other room. Patton sighed as his gaze met Remus's.

“Remus, kiddo, I’m so sorry… I made such a mess of you and Logan’s party.” The fact that even in his anguish Patton could still feel such responsibility for something he hadn’t been the cause of was heartbreaking. Remus shook his head quickly, clumsily taking one of Patton’s hands in his own.

“Hey, no. Don’t say that, Pattycake,” Remus said, hoping his sincerity was breaking through the barrier of fear that encased him, “You didn’t do anything wrong, and you certainly didn’t make a mess. It _isn’t_ your fault, none of this is.” Patton nodded, though the tired expression he wore suggested he didn’t agree with Remus’s sentiment. 

“But I still can’t help but feel –.”

“I know,” Remus interrupted, seeing the surprise in Patton’s pale blue eyes, “I know it feels like it might be your fault. But it really isn’t. _Please_ , don’t blame yourself for your parent’s horrible actions.” Patton’s face crumpled at the mention of them, but Remus knew someone was going to have to get the words out for any progress to be made.

“Words are so _hard_ sometimes…” Patton mumbled as Remus squeezed his hand gently, “There’s so much I want to say about them… but it’s just hard. Why does it have to be like that?” 

“You can tell us anything you want,” Roman spoke up, placing a hand on Patton’s shoulder, the gesture just above a hover in case Patton pulled away. He didn’t. “And you don’t need to talk about anything that’s too much for you. We’re here for you, Pat, in anything you want to tell us. We know how it feels.” Patton nodded sadly, his eyes landing on his lap. 

“I thought…” Patton began, his voice tender, “I thought for sure they were gonna come around. I mean, they _said_ they would. They said a lot of things…” 

“Of course you thought that,” Roman said, “That makes sense. They gave you a false sense of security.” Patton shivered.

“Not at first. When I came out to them t-they were so cruel. They called me sick, they said how much they wanted to help me, to _fix_ me. But the things they offered… they… they were just gonna make me feel so much worse. It had been so hard to hide, and I was so sad, all the time, pretending.” Roman’s eyes flickered with understanding.

“I know how you felt,” he said, speech thick with twisted memories, “I pretended too. Throughout high school, I dated girls, I did everything I could to make people think I was straight. And it _hurt_ , all of the time.” Patton nodded, a tear slipping down his cheek.

“It was hard,” he said with a sniffle, “I – just wanted to make my parents happy. I thought if I just kept pretending that eventually, I’d, I dunno, get used to it. But… I didn’t. It just felt worse and worse and I just felt like exploding all the time. So,” Patton sucked in a breath, “I told them. A-and they were so angry and hurt by it, it felt like I was something so _terrible_.”

“You aren’t,” Remus assured, “You’re nothing of the sort. I’ve known terrible people, I’ve had my moments of being terrible, and that isn’t you at all, Pat. You’re one of the best people I know.” Patton worried his bottom lip. 

“I don’t know about that.”

“He’s right,” Roman said, “You’re a wonderful person, Patton. One of the very best life has to offer. You make everyone around you happy just by being _you_. There’s not a single terrible thing in you, and certainly not because your parents don’t approve of you going for princes rather than a princess.” 

“I just… they started getting better after that,” Patton said, wiping at his eyes, “At least it seemed like it. They stopped talking about fixing me, they s-said they wanted to make things right. And when I started seeing Janus, well, I didn’t realize how unhappy I’d been before that. I didn’t know real happiness could feel so good. And t-they allowed me to bring him home, several times, a-and they told me they were trying. They _lied_ – they lied to me over, and over again.”

“They did,” Remus said, the sorrow in Patton’s voice tearing him up inside so much he could almost forget about the goldfish completely, “They lied to you and I’m so sorry for that. They had no right to do that to you.”

“I don’t like lies… I don’t like it when people keep things from me. And the entire time they thought I was just gonna _stop_ being gay one day,” Patton wept, “And t-then my mom told me that – that if I ever wanted to see them again t-that I couldn’t be with Janus anymore. They tried to _take him away from me_! H-how could they do that? How could they try to take my h-happiness away from me again? How can they be so cruel?!” Patton let go of Remus’s hand and threw his arms around Roman, burying his face in his shoulder. Roman accepted the hug quickly, rubbing circles into Patton’s back as he cried. 

“I don’t know,” Roman said, the loss for words terrible, “I’m sorry I don’t have a better answer for you, Patton. I wish I did. But I just don’t know how anyone could do that to someone, much less their child.”

“What did you say to your mom when she told you that?” Remus asked after Patton had taken a moment to calm down. Patton scrubbed at his face, still leaning heavily on Roman.

“I – I said I couldn’t leave Jan. I told her he’s the light of my life, and that I _love_ him, just like she loves my dad. For a second I-I thought maybe saying that would help, but it didn’t. Of course, it's d-didn’t. She just got angrier and angrier and i-it was too late for anything else. That was it. I-I can’t go back home. I can’t face them again,” a shudder ran through Patton’s spine as he continued, “I don’t _want_ to. Not a-anymore.”

“I know this is horrible,” Remus spoke up, “And I wish I could say that it’s going to be all better right away. It isn’t. But I want you to know I’m proud of you for saying that. That you don’t want to go back. I know it’s so fucking hard, but that’s good, Pat. These are people who’ve hurt you for so long, and they don’t get to do that anymore. You never deserved that.”

“Janny kept telling me they were still hurting me,” Patton said with a sniffle, “He told me that they were being cruel, but I wouldn’t listen. I _should_ have. I should’ve known…” Both twins shook their heads.

“No,” Roman said quickly, “Please don’t say you should’ve known. Pat, you don’t know how many times I told myself the very same thing. That I should’ve known my parents weren’t going to change, that hiding wasn’t doing anything but making me miserable. I promise you, saying that doesn’t do any good.”

“But I should’ve listened. He was right.”

“You were clinging to the hope that things were going to be alright,” Remus cut in, “It didn’t matter what Janus said, it wouldn’t have changed the fact that you had hope that you and your parents could mend the relationship. Don’t beat yourself up about that, it’s okay.”

“I just wanted everything to be okay,” Patton muttered softly, “I was so sure…”

“Things _will_ be okay again, Pat,” Roman said, pulling Patton against him in a side hug, “Not right now, but eventually, I promise they will.”

“What made it okay for you guys?” Patton asked after a moment, the smallest fragment of hope present in his voice.

“Surrounding myself with good people was the biggest thing,” Roman said, “And you’ve got that. You have a partner who loves you so, so much. And friends who love you too. We love you, Patton, and we’re here for you.” 

“We are,” Remus said with a nod.

Remus couldn’t help but let his mind wander for a moment, to a time years ago. He and Roman were nineteen when they’d been disowned, and shortly after that, they hadn’t been on good terms. Remus hadn’t thought about it in so long, now twenty-seven with incredible friends and the best boyfriend a person could ask for, but when he’d been abandoned by his parents, Remus had been alone. Not entirely, he’d had acquaintances along the way, partners who hadn’t stuck around long. But for the most part, he hadn’t had the good friends Roman had quickly gained. He hadn’t had Patton or Virgil. He hadn’t had Janus, Remy, or Emile. He hadn’t had _Logan_. 

For so much of his time at home, Remus had known eventually he and his parents would cut ties for good. But remembering suddenly and vividly how truly alone he’d been hit him with immeasurable weight. “Surround yourself with good people,” Roman said now, but he didn’t. Not for years. Not until Logan. 

He should’ve tried harder to fix things with Roman sooner, he thought to himself. He should’ve tried to forge stronger relationships. Should’ve, should’ve, _should’ve_. But should is a dirty word. “Should” made it seem like Remus had any idea the kind of hell he’d been putting himself through at the time. He hadn’t; he was dealing with all his shit in the ways he knew how. He didn’t have support then, he remembered, but he had it now. He had good friends, he had Logan, he had _love_. And thankfully, in this time Patton had that too. 

“Yeah,” Patton said after a moment, “Yeah I do. I’ve got Jan, I’ve got you guys. I’m really, really sad… but I’m not gonna be sad forever, am I?” 

“No,” Roman said, “You won’t. You’ll need time to heal, and it’ll hurt, but you’re gonna get happy again, Pat. And we’ll be here every step of the way.” Tears sprung from Patton’s eyes once more, this time not out of sadness alone, but also relief.

“I love you guys s-so much,” Patton blubbered, his arms winding around both twins. For a moment, Remus stiffened. Patton said, “you guys,” which meant both of them. Patton loved Remus. He hadn’t taken the time to consider it, the fact that a friend could love him, that _Patton_ could love him. 

He’d been so used to such kind words not being spoken in his presence before Logan before love had dominated his life. But to think that this person, so wonderful and kind and full of light, had love in his heart for all of his friends, _including_ him. Well, Remus thought his chest might just burst from how much sentimentality welled up in him. He returned the awkward embrace as quickly as he could manage, clinging to Roman and Patton.

“We love you too, Pat,” he said it was true. Remus loved his friend and his friend loved him. In retrospect, it was such a simple thing, not the kind to be scrutinized so closely but he couldn’t help it. Roman said he loved Patton too, but Remus’s ears were still ringing with the words. The sorrow of his long-time-loneliness wasn’t irradiated, but the joy that filled him served as a damn good distraction. 

Suddenly, Janus reappeared from the kitchen holding a tray of the sweets that Roman had brought, setting it down and joining the three in the living room. Roman and Remus made room so that Janus could sit with Patton, who clambered into his lap and buried his face in his neck.

To call such a love sin defied all logic. So few loves rivaled this, so few were as soft, as touchingly gentle, as pure. 

The group ate and talked, the tension that hung thick in the air dispersing little by little. It wouldn’t be gone completely for a long time, if ever, but it was lessening and that was all that anyone could hope for. It would take time, but Patton was going to be okay. It was obvious looking at him and Janus that his heart would not be void of joy. As horrible as it was to think about, Patton no longer being in contact with his parents would do him so much good in the end. They didn’t have their hooks in him like they used to, they couldn’t cause him any further suffering. Patton would grow without them, allowed finally and freely to be as happy as he deserved to be.

Remus and Roman bid the couple goodbye several hours into their stay, leaving the apartment together. As they walked to their cars, Roman stopped.

“I realize… I never properly thanked you, all those years ago.” Remus rose an eyebrow.

“For what?”

“For giving me the courage I needed to be myself,” Roman said with an appreciative smile, “You being so open and honest about yourself was the final push to me coming out. Without you… I don’t know when I would’ve been able to do it. So, thank you for that. I love you, Remus. I know we haven’t always gotten along, but you’re the best brother a guy could ask for as far as I’m concerned.” 

After how emotional the day had been, it seemed that was the straw that broke the camel’s back. Remus sniffled, hugging his brother and thinking of the overwhelming amounts of love he’d been exposed to in the last few hours.

“Of course,” he said hoarsely, “Y-you’re welcome. I love you too, you loser.” Roman chuckled, the sound watery. At least Remus wasn’t crying alone.

“Are you okay, after all that?” Roman asked as they pulled apart. 

“Not really,” Remus said. “You?” Roman laughed without much humor to it, shaking his head.

“No, I suppose not,” Roman replied sadly, “But I’m glad we did that. It seemed like it helped.” 

“Yeah,” Remus said, still in a bit of disbelief, “It really did.” Roman shoved his shoulder lightly.

“And you were worried you weren’t gonna be able to help,” he teased, 

“Look at how good you did! Grad-A comforting skills.”

“Yeah, well, you helped a lot.”

“Well then we’ve _both_ got Grad-A comforting skills,” he said confidently, though the assurance felt a little forced, “You gonna be okay, though?”

"I’ll be fine,” Remus said, “Same goes for you. Head all full of shitty memories?” Roman nodded sadly.

“You know it. I’m going home and cuddling Virgil until I can push it out of my mind a little bit more. I haven’t thought about all this in quite a long time.”

“Sounds like a plan to me.” Roman quirked an eyebrow.

“Cuddling with my boyfriend sounds like a plan?” Remus barked out a laugh.

“That’s right, I’m moving in on your mans. My relationship with Logan was all a clever ruse to seduce Virgil all along.” Roman slapped a hand over his mouth.

“And to think! I was none the wiser! How dare you, sir? I’ll have you know I love that man more than life itself!” Roman said as dramatic as possible. Remus appreciated the attempt at being light-hearted.

“Seriously, though, I’m not allowing Logan to leave my arms when I get home because I feel like shit.” Roman nodded understandingly. 

“Now there’s a sentiment I can get behind.” Roman paused for a moment before speaking again. “So… what’s your plan on becoming betrothed to our resident nerd?” Remus rubbed the back of his neck, sighing.

“Honestly, dude, I’ve got no fucking clue. But I’ll figure it out,” Remus said. 

The prospect should’ve terrified him. He presently had zero plan as to how he was going to ask Logan to be his husband. But somehow, even after the deeply emotional day he’d had, he wasn’t scared. Remus wasn’t usually the person to assume that everything would work out somehow, but he couldn’t help but know it to be true. He loved Logan more than he’d loved anyone or anything else in his life. Logan had brought him so many good things in the short time he’d known him. He’d provided him the support, understanding, and love he didn’t know he’d been missing. He’d brought him wonderful friendships; he’d brought his brother back to him. Remus had nearly been killed by a car, and yet he’d lived, and Logan was still by his side. As far as he was concerned, Logan always would be.

“Well I wish you the absolute best of luck,” Roman said sincerely, “Now if you’ll excuse me, I have an emo to cuddle with.” 

And with that, the two drove home. Roman to Virgil and Remus to Logan. Both brothers sought comfort in their boyfriends, still battling the demons of their past, demons they’d never truly be able to escape. And even still, they were met with just the love and understanding they needed, enough to keep the monsters at bay.

Remus would propose to Logan very soon, that he was sure of. But for now, he accepted his place in Logan’s arms, clinging for dear life and thinking only of the love that had become all-consuming, a chaos he embraced with open arms.

=+=

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phew! That was the longest chapter yet, clocking at a little over 4,500 words. This was for sure a really emotional chapter to write, and I hope you enjoyed it. I'd love to hear what you thought and, as always, have a wonderful day/night!


	10. Chapter 10

Remus was sure an elaborate plan was going to come upon him anytime now. He’d been counting on it, _praying_ for it, honestly. He’d been so confident of the party idea, but surely, he’d be able to conjure up something even better.

Except, maybe not.

The idea of asking Logan for his hand, while something he wished he’d already done, filled him with more anxiety than he’d been subject to in years. Proposing in a public setting was a no-go after last time; there was no way he’d get through it in one piece. Something small and intimate seemed nice. Proposing over candlelit dinner was always a trope he’d rather enjoyed, or on a moonlit walk through the park. He needed something cliché, something romantic, something that’d make Logan _swoon_.

But every time he so much as _thought_ about getting down on one-knee, Remus felt like he couldn’t breathe. It didn’t make sense; he wanted this more than he’d ever wanted anything else in his life! He was determined to make Logan his for the rest of their lives, it was all that’d been on his mind for a month. So, why did this have to be so fucking hard?

At first, he’d told himself that it’d be wrong to do it right after his and Roman’s visit with Patton, considering the emotional intensity of the situation. But now it’d been two weeks since then, Patton was on the road to healing with Janus and the rest of his friends by his side as always, and he still hadn’t done it!

Remus knew their friends were waiting with baited breaths for the joyous news, and yet it hadn’t come. Beforehand, Remus had been positive he could do this. But now? The imperfections of fractions of plans seemed glaringly obvious. Nothing was good enough for Logan, nothing could _possibly_ be worthy.

For the most part, Remus had been convinced the tensions between them had lifted to a degree. Remus was still wound up as tight as ever, of course, contemplating a proposal in nearly every waking moment, filled with an unheard-of amount of self-doubt. Logan had his moments of strain too, when he seemed a little more on edge than usual, a little tighter in embraces, a tad more distant. But Remus chalked it up to his own insecurities washing over everything else in his life, including his partner.

Remus had come _so_ close that night, yet it was out of his reach in an instance. He was sure Logan was picking up on his tensity; he’d have to be an idiot not to, and Logan was no idiot. Still, he’d chosen not to say anything about it.

Remus found himself losing sleep over everything, tossing and turning, desperate to get those four little words out. He found little solace in slumber, dreaming extensively of his and Logan’s wedding, honeymoon, and montages of their life as a married couple. He was fairly sure there had been a dog involved in one of the dreams and that just made his heart ache.

He knew he was torturing himself more with each passing day, continuing to drive the nail further in, but he didn’t know how to stop it. Not when everything felt so jumbled, so inconsistent and imperfect.

Remus was no stranger to insecurity, but this was a beast he’d never gone up against until now. He’d never doubted every idea that came to mind, never beaten down every idea, believing it to be nothing more than unforgivably unacceptable. He’d gone into the idea of marrying Logan so headstrong but now everything was twisted and wrong, like a nightmare that wouldn’t let up no matter how many times he tried to wake up.

“Remus?”

Remus was startled from his now-constant stream of anxiety by Logan’s soft voice. He glanced around the darkened living room, vaguely aware that they’d been watching a movie together, though he was having a hard time remembering which one. Looking at the characters on the screen offered him little help, further expressing just how out of it he was.

“What’s up?” He asked, hoping he sounded something close to not entirely spaced out.

“ _What’s up_?” Logan parroted, though he sounded far more concerned than annoyed, “Remus, you’re eyes have been glazed over the entire time, leading me to believe you aren’t paying any attention to the film,” – well, he was certainly right about that –, “You’ve been incredibly rigid and you have responded to very few of the comments I’ve made. Something’s obviously the matter.” Remus averted his eyes, despite how much more incriminating that might’ve seemed.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

With a sigh, Logan paused the movie and rose from the couch to turn the lights off, no longer allowing darkness to shroud Remus’s insecurities. He sat back down, eyeing Remus carefully, who shuffled under his gaze.

“Love, I don’t know what you’re playing at. You and I both know you’re not one to lie.” Remus bit his lip.

“I’m _not_ lying about anything.”

“You’re not telling me the truth, either,” Logan said, pinching his temple, “I’m not trying to antagonize you, Remus, I’m merely… concerned.” “Concerned” didn’t even begin to cover it.

While Logan had been going through his own panic and self-doubt for the last several weeks, which was to say an _incredible_ amount of panic, he’d also picked up on Remus’s odd behavior that was getting more perplexing by the day. Usually, Remus was such a carefree, do now think later kind of a person. He was impulsive and wild, and free. Except… he hadn’t been acting that way at all, not lately.

He seemed to want to shrink down, rather than take up as much space as possible. Logan had heard that wonderous, bold, and crackling laugh less and less, something that he considered near criminal. Even in an embrace, Remus was too stiff, too solid. Logan had been too distracted with his own failings and self-pitying to pick up the initial signs of something being amiss, but now it was so obtrusive, so in Logan’s face that he had no choice but to challenge it.

“What’s there to be concerned about?” Remus had never been all that good at playing dumb, and this was no exception. Logan exhaled sharply.

“You’ve been acting different lately. Ever since the party and I…, I want to understand what’s going on. I can’t see what’s happening in your head, and I’m not always the best at picking up cues. So, _please_ ,” Logan said in a voice that was edging on desperation, taking Remus hand and finally meeting his eyes fully, “Tell me what’s wrong.”

“You’ve been acting weird too, y’ know,” Remus said, perhaps in an attempt to derail the conversation, he wasn’t entirely sure. All he knew was this was heading in a bad direction fast and he _needed_ to stop it. The comment floored Logan, who for a moment, went quiet though his hand didn’t release its grip.

“I have?” Remus scoffed.

“Now who’s lying? C’mon, you _know_ you’ve been being weird lately. Since… well, since the party, I guess? I dunno, you were being weird before that, too.” Logan shook his head, feeling his pulse jump.

“We’re not talking about me right now. We’re talking about you.”  
  
“Well, why can’t we talk about you?”

“Remus –.”  
  
“Seriously. You’ve been all awkward and stiff and I didn’t know what to say so I guess I just fucking didn’t but –.”

“ _Remus_ ,” Logan interrupted, his tone thick with exhaustion. Remus promptly shut his mouth and Logan took a steadying breath. “Clearly, this isn’t getting us anywhere.”

“Yeah, maybe not,” Remus grumbled irritably. Logan took a steadying breath, doing his best to remain patient.

“I… I’m sorry. If I’ve come off as upset with you. I’m not. I just don’t understand what’s going on. I don’t _like_ it when things don’t make sense. Things have felt strange ever since… well, ever since you started to deliver that speech.” Remus’s heart clenched in his chest.

“What speech?” He couldn’t stop the gears from turning in Logan’s head if he tried, and damnit was trying.

“Just before Patton got the phone call,” Logan said, sounding surer of himself with each word, “You let go of my hand, and you told me there was something you needed to say. The look in your eye, it was so serious. As if… as if you had something incredibly important to say to me. I can’t believe I didn’t ask you about it when we got home, it was just such an exhausting night, and the timing didn’t feel right but –.”

“Whoa, hey, I’d hardly call that a speech,” Remus interrupted quickly, his voice wavering, “I barely got a few words out. I-it could’ve been anything, who the hell knows what I was going to say!”

“But you _do_ know, don’t you?” Logan asked, seeing the panic flickering in his boyfriend’s eyes, “You know exactly what you were going to say. You remember.”

“I… maybe?” The look Logan gave him could’ve split him in two. “Okay, _fine_ , yeah! I know.” Terrible silence settled over the couple for a moment, tension weighing them down to a point where both were afraid to disrupt the fragile quiet. Then, after what felt like an eternity, Logan spoke.

“Won’t you tell me?” he asked, his voice sounding so reserved, so small. Remus bit his lip, seeing the desperation written all over Logan’s face, the deep need to understand what in the world was going on between them.   
  
Remus’s mind was teeming with every bit of insecurity that had been building up for the last few weeks, thinking of every possible way that things could go wrong, every way that this wasn’t at all what he’d envisioned for this moment. Except… amongst the chaos his mind had produced, there was Logan. Beautiful, _wonderful_ Logan who just wanted things to be okay. And how could Remus blame him for a thing like that?

“Do you really want to know?” He found himself asking, despite the hesitations that tried everything to convince himself to dig his heels into the dirt and keep wallowing, keep pitying himself for not just fucking doing it. In the end, though, Logan’s vehement nod is all it took to convince Remus he didn't have any other choice.

“Okay. Shit – okay, alright,” he said, only somewhat frantically as he stood up from the couch. Logan tilted his head in confusion, and Remus might’ve compared the motion to that of a puppy if he wasn’t being pumped with so much anxiety, he was beginning to feel quite a bit like Virgil. “Wait right here for just a second. I’ll – I’ll be right back.”

Remus all but scurried into their bedroom, leaving an already disquieted Logan to stew in his worry for a little bit longer. Remus felt himself tremble as he knelt on his hands and knees and reached under the nightstand, pulling the ring box from its hiding place.

As he stood back up and shoved the object in his pocket, Remus allowed himself one, terrible, sobering moment of complete and utter panic. This wasn’t how he wanted to go about things, not at all. He wanted this to be perfect for Logan, he _wanted_ to give him everything and anything that his heart desired. But even so, this was how things had played out and there was little that could be done to stop it. Additionally, he wasn’t sure how much longer he was going to be able to torture himself, and this was certainly a way to cease that.

So, he took a deep breath, and then a few more before he walked back into the living room, praying for something close to confidence.

“What were you doing in the bedroom?” Logan asked, looking uneasy, “Remus, what’s going on?”

Remus walked back to the sofa and stood beside his boyfriend. For the briefest instance, he took in the world that Logan’s eyes contained. All of the fear, all of the confusion and uncertainty, all of the _love_. He was sure he could look into those eyes for every minute of the rest of his life and still keep finding new things to love about them. A cosmos all his own, glittering with all the treasures of the night sky, constellations he knew he would always get to see, no matter the time of day.

“You’re right,” Remus began, not daring to tear his gaze from Logan’s eyes and knowing that despite his nerves, despite the panic and lack of a concrete plan that this was exactly what he was meant to do, “I know exactly what I wanted to say that night. And… well, I hadn’t planned on saying it now, but what am I if not impulsive, right?” Remus tacked on a chuckle, hoping it did something to mask the fear that dwelled within him.

“I –,” Logan hesitated, having been thrust into a moment of intimacy he mustn’t have been expecting. “Alright. Go ahead, love. I’m listening,” he said after a pause, looking more than a little panicked himself. That panic escalated tenfold when Remus got down on one knee. “ _R-Remus_?”

“Logan, Dragonfly… I love you more than I thought I’d ever be able to love somebody,” Remus professed, feeling the tears beginning to well behind his eyes and thinking, briefly, of a time when he hadn’t been so ruled by his emotions, and what a dreadful time that had been, “You’re the smartest, hottest, most amazing, _best_ man I’ve ever known. You’ve made my life better the moment you were in it and – and I don’t ever want to let go of that if I don’t have to. You – you make me better, and fuck, I hope you think I make you better, too.

“Before you, I didn’t know what it felt like to be truly, genuinely happy, but you’ve given me that. you’ve given me anything and everything I could ever dream of having, just by being you.”

Logan clamped a hand over his mouth, watching as Remus bared his heart and soul.

“I know a year really isn’t that long,” Remus continued with a watery laugh, “And I know this might seem fucking insane. But... I’ve never been so sure of _anything_ in my goddamn life. I love you, Dragonfly, with the entirety of the heart I didn’t know I had. And I want to promise you anything you want. I’d give you the moon, I’d give you all the stars in the sky if I could.

“I can’t give you those things, no matter how much I want to,” he said, tears near their tipping point as he took a shuddery breath as he took the box from his pocket and popped it open, revealing a silver band set with a Safire,

“But I can promise to be yours. I can promise you a f-future, and I _promise_ I’ll keep loving you with every bit of my wrenched soul. You’re the love of my life, Logan Sanders, and I want to give you forever, i-if you want it too,” he said, eyes burning with sincerity, “So, will you do me the utmost pleasure of allowing me to keep bothering you every day for the rest of our lives?"

For a moment, Logan was quiet, tears slipping underneath his glasses as he shivered, watching his boyfriend on one-knee in their living room before a single word made its way through the cacophony of his mind: _“No.”_

Logan was near-certain he saw Remus’s heart shatter into a million pieces. The hopeful, buoyant expression he’d been wearing just seconds ago is replaced with sullen, bitter heartbreak. He shut the ring box, getting up off the carpet.

“R-right – yeah. Okay, yeah, it’s too soon. I-I get that,” and the chuckle that bellows from him is positively grief-stricken, “I’m probably a fucking _idiot_ for asking so soon.” The tears are slipping down Remus’s face and it’s so clear he was excepting an exuberant _“Yes!”_ Was praying for it, at the very least. And then, finally, Logan snapped out of it. 

“N-no!” Logan repeated, standing up from the couch and scrubbing at his face, his eyes darting around the room, “I mean – _not_ no.” Despite everything, Remus _dared_ to look hopeful again, if only for a moment.

“Not… not _no_?”

“No. I – I mean – wait right there!” Logan said before running into their bedroom. The door slammed against the wall as he bustled to the closet, quickly grabbing what he’s looking for before swiftly making his way back into the living room and showing Remus the box. For a moment Remus couldn’t believe what he was seeing, confusing it with some fantastical dream but it was _real_. Logan was really here, with a ring of his own, crying just the same.

“ _Oh_ ,” Remus said, eyes going from Logan to the ring box in his hand, to Logan again, “Oh you’ve – you’ve gotta be _shitting_ me. There’s – there’s no fucking way that we-we that we _both_ –.” But there is a way, because here they were, standing staring at each other like they’re all they’d ever needed.

“I love you,” Logan said, opening the box and revealing the gold ring with emerald stone, Remus’s favorite color, “I wanted – that is to say, I’d been _planning_ on a more romantic way of professing this –.”

“Me too,” Remus interrupted with a laugh, light and airy, “Me too, Dragonfly. I was going to –.” 

“At the party?” Logan cut in, and Remus nodded with another laugh. Logan couldn’t help but laugh, too. “Me as well. That night, I – I was going to –.”

“Did you torture yourself after that, too?” Remus asked, and Logan nodded once more. “God, we’re such a fucking mess, huh? Our friends must _hate_ us – they’ve all got to know.”

“I – I asked Virgil to host the party, so I could propose that night,” Logan admitted, earning a cackle from Remus.

“And I asked Roman to host a party that night so I could propose to _you_!”

“We’re significantly stupid,” Logan said, before realizing they’d been inching closer and closer to one another as well as the lovesickness in Remus’s eyes.

“So… I’m gonna go off on a limb and assume that’s a yes?” Remus asked, gesturing to the ring. Logan nodded quickly, tears plastered to his face as he collapsed into Remus’s arms and pulled him into a bruising kiss. The embrace was broken only in desperation for air.

“That’s a yes,” Logan whispered against his lips, biting down just slightly, earning a quiet moan in response. “I love you. I love you. _I love you_.” Logan punctuated each statement with a kiss, each lingering more than the last. The pair stumbled to slide the rings on each other’s fingers, laughing at the absurdity of it all the while before Remus found himself pinned to the couch, his arms pinned behind his back, and Logan kissing him senseless.

Sometime later, he’d search for his senses. Later, the reality that they were really engaged, and that they’d _both_ proposed, would dawn. Later, he’d fully realize how stupid they’d both been acting for weeks, dancing around each other, when everything they’d feared was fiction and everything they’d hoped for was right in front of them.

But for now, Remus savored. For now, Remus prayed to be devoured, to be poured over with love, and passion, and praise. For now, Remus would love the man he’d chosen to marry every way he knew how.

=+=

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ho Boy we finally got to the proposals! I hope you enjoyed it because I certainly enjoyed writing it! But the story's not quite over yet *cough cough* I've just set us up for a bit of smut in the next chapter *cough cough* and there'll, of course, be a wedding and probably an epilog, if I'm honest. I already know I'm going to have a hard time saying goodbye to this story; I've been having so much fun with it. Have an absolutely wonderful day/night, I'll see you in the next chapter!


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heyyy, it's almost entirely smut this chapter, so if you really don't wanna read it, you should be able to read the next chapter, which is gonna be the wedding, with little issue. I haven't written smut in quite a while, and I'm not perfect at it so please be understanding. Enjoy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Logan is a top and you can’t stop me

“We – we’re fucking idiots,” Remus breathed out as Logan pulled away long enough for him to get a word out. Logan chuckled, his breath warm against Remus’s face. 

“Yes, we are,” he said, as he kissed Remus’s neck eagerly, “More so than I might’ve assumed.” 

“I’ve been torturing myself these last few weeks, telling myself nothing was gonna be good enough for you – _fuck_ ,” Remus broke off as Logan pressed an open-mouthed kiss to his pulse-point, his heart thundering.

“What would ever give you that indication?” Logan whispered against his skin, releasing his hold on Remus’s arms as his hands slid down to his shoulders. “It was a wonderful proposal, my love.” 

“Mmm, “your love”, huh?” Remus asked with a breathy chuckle, “Soundin’ a bit like Roman.”

“Is that what you’d prefer, then?” Logan asked as he hovered over Remus, his grip on his shoulders tightening just so, “That I wax poetics like your brother? Is that what you want?” 

“No,” Remus said, grabbing hold of Logan’s hips, “No - I don’t want you to talk like that.”

“What _do_ you want me to talk like?” Logan asked, his voice teasing and husky in a way it almost never sounded. _Almost_.

“Talk however you want,” Remus gasped lightly as Logan’s hands wandered further down his body, “Say whatever the hell you want. Just - just keep doing what you’re doing.”

“So beautiful,” Logan said, fondness dripping with every word. Those who didn’t know Remus nearly as well might look at him, all rough around the edges and crude jokes, and think he wasn’t the type to melt at a little well-placed praise. However, as Logan knew exceedingly well, they’d be dead wrong. “Look at this gorgeous fiancé I’ve managed to snatch up.”

“In all fairness, _I_ was the one to propose to you first. I’m technically the one who –,” Remus’s sentence was interrupted by a heady whine as Logan nipped at his neck. “– _mmm_ , you know I _love_ it when you leave marks. Promise me – promise me, you’ll leave beautiful marks.” Logan chuckled, his teeth digging slightly into the pale flesh of Remus’s neck.

“Anything you’d like, dear,” he said, before resuming his work.

Remus often wore love-bites like badges of honor, proud of the man who’d left them and almost a little too eager to show them off at times. Logan insisted, almost always, that he not be so boastful about their sex-life. It wasn’t hard to tell he was a little embarrassed about the way his fiancé was so eager to kiss-and-tell, not that anything about that should’ve continued to surprise him, so he usually kept it bellow the collar. However, on this the night of their engagement, who could blame him for getting a little carried away?

Logan sunk his teeth into Remus’s neck, leaving bruising kisses that elicited the most _beautiful_ noises from his partner. Logan grazed against his collar bone, feeling Remus shiver beneath him. He paused just above the collar of his shirt, fingers settling there before Remus cried out, and rather impatiently, at that.

“Take it _off_ , Dragonfly,” he demanded, hunger heavy in his voice, “While you’re at it, lose some clothes yourself. You’ve got _farrrr_ too many layers on, for my taste.” Logan didn’t need to be told twice.

He pulled the shirt from Remus, tossing it carelessly aside. Quickly, his hands settled back at Remus’s hips as he kissed down his collar bone, leaving a trail of nips in his wake. Remus keened beneath him, yanking Logan by the collar he still had on and kissing him breathless. Logan gasped into his mouth as Remus gave a less than subtle roll of the hips, his hands still wound in his lover’s tie. Even through his jeans, Logan could feel Remus’s hard-on as the friction turned a tad desperate, Remus’s tongue exploring every corner of his mouth as if he hadn’t done so a thousand times before, grinding wantonly against him.

“Someone’s eager,” Logan breathed out as if the feeling wasn’t clearly mutual.

“I said,” Remus repeated slowly, releasing his grip on the tie before digging into the collar of Logan’s polo, “You’re wearing too many layers.”

“Then I suppose we’ll have to remedy that, won’t we?” Logan asked, desire burning in his eyes.

In a blur, they were shedding their clothing, interrupted only by burning touches and lingering kisses, each more desperate than the last. They stumbled on their way to the bedroom, Remus finding himself pinned to a wall in the hallway, the last of their clothes still in-tact. His fingers threaded in Logan’s hair as his fiancé kissed roughly at his neck once more, pushing his thigh up against Remus’s now-trembling legs and rolling his hips slowly. Remus’s mouth flew open, gasping awed as his grip on Logan’s shoulder tightened.

“ _Fuck_ , Dragonfly, k-keep at it like that and I won’t make it very long.” Logan certainly couldn’t have that. In a show of strength, Logan wasn’t entirely sure he was capable of, he gripped tightly to Remus and picked him up. Their bedroom was merely a few feet away, and Remus buried his face in Logan’s neck as he carried them inside.

He set Remus down on the bed slowly, his fiancé still seemingly lost in the fact that he’d just been carried to bed like some kind of ridiculously trashy paperback romance before he pulled Logan down with him and the rest of their clothing was discarded.

“I love you,” Logan professed breathlessly, voice brimming with devotion, “More than I knew it possible to love another person. You are everything to me, my dear. Positively everything.”

“I love you too,” Remus said, a love-sick smile gracing his lips for a moment as Logan stroked his cheek before grabbing hold of his lover’s wrist and gripping hard. “Now, please _fuck me_.” 

Logan could certainly get behind the sentiment. He knelt between Remus’s legs, now spread-wide, a bottle of lube in hand.

“Are you ready–,” he began to ask before Remus responded with an indigent “Yes!” Logan relished in the sound Remus made as he eased a finger in, a sound he was positive he’d never tire of hearing.

“Ngh– _Dragonfly_ ,” Remus cried out as Logan inserted another finger, beginning to thrust in an achingly slow motion. “That’s – don’t stop. Don’t fucking stop –,” he gasped, eyes fluttering shut as Logan added a third finger, beginning to pick up the pace. Remus whined petulantly as Logan pulls his finger out, throughout disappointed with the lack of contact. 

“C’mon, Logan, I – _ahh_ ,” Remus broke off once Logan had quickly applied the lube and began to press the tip of his cock against Remus’s entrance.

“I’ve got you, dear. You’re so good, so good for me,” he praised softly as he slowly pushed into Remus, groaning at the feeling of him around him. Logan pressed a heated kiss to his lover, Remus groaning into his mouth in response.

“Fuckin’ _move_ ,” he begged, already beginning to lose his last shreds of composure.

“Of course, my dear,” Logan said, beginning to thrust, languidly at first, the pace almost punishingly slow. Remus allowed the listless speed for a moment, overwhelmed at the feeling of Logan inside of him before it grew to be too much to bear.

“Gorgeous,” Logan remarked ardently, his thrusts continuing at a steady, slow pace as he hits Remus’s prostate, earning a whine that simply _had_ to be too good to be legal.

“Fuck – _faster_ , Lo. _Please_ ,” the last word came out a plead as Logan’s hands trail down his body, carefully studying the pale flesh as he trails over Remus’s now-leaking cock.

“What a beautiful man you are,” Logan continued, beginning to stroke Remus’s shaft as his thrusts increased in speed. Remus cried out in bliss, his back arching and eyes blowing wide as his hands scramble for support, nails digging into Logan’s back.

“ _Gah_ \- _so_ close, Dragonfly. Lo-Logan, _please_ , don’t stop! Do-don’t fucking stop! I love you! I love you!!” Remus blathered loudly, Logan thrusting faster still, his grip on Remus’s cock becoming firmer. The heat that enveloped them bathed them in warmth, burning, and white-hot. Logan leaned in, kissing the juncture between Remus’s neck and shoulder, open-mouthed, sinking his teeth in and leaving a masterful mark.

That, it seemed, was the breaking point.

Roman howled Logan’s name again, and again like a mantra as he came into Logan’s fingers. The sudden tightness of his muscles was all that Logan needed, the teacher reaching his climax as well, stars exploding over his vision. They shared slow, exhausted kisses as they caught their breaths and Logan pulled out.

“That was great,” Remus muttered adoringly, running a hand through Logan’s hair that was damp with sweat. “I love you, Dragonfly. So, _so_ fucking much.”

“I love you too, my dear.”

After a few dozen more lingering kisses the pair headed to the shower to clean themselves up – and if they happened to manage to get distracted again once in the shower, that was no one’s business but theirs. They soon found themselves back in bed, the lights shut off as the embraced, clinging to one another as though their survival was dependent on it.

“We’re engaged,” Remus said, the intensity of that knowledge still washing over them. Logan fumbled to find Remus’s hand, pressing a kiss to his knuckle.

“We are,” Logan replied, so much wonderment present in each word. “Soon, I’ll have the pleasure of calling you, my husband.” Remus grinned in the darkness, lacing their fingers together.

“And I’ll get to call you _my_ husband. Holy shit – I love the sound of that.” Logan could certainly agree with the sentiment.

“We’ve been rather foolish, haven’t we?” Remus laughed, the sound layered with exhaustion.

“That’s one way to put it – we hid our rings in the same room, for fuck’s sake! All our friends have known we were doing this for forever. Oh damn, still got to text them the big news, huh?” Logan pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek.

“We’ll tell them tomorrow. It’s rather late.” Remus hummed in response, moving so that his head was laying on Logan’s chest.

“I was so worried you were gonna think I was crazy, proposing this early on,” Remus admitted after a moment of silence. “I just took a look at you sleeping, one morning, and I knew I had to have you for the rest of my life and that I wasn’t ever going to love someone the way I love you.” Logan broke out into a smile, and though it was dark in the room, Remus was positive of its presence.

“I was afraid too,” he said, “It came to me in a dream, of all things. I dreamt we were married, and the thought wouldn’t leave my head.”

“That night you woke up all frantic and went to the kitchen?” Logan hummed. “Aw, Dragonfly, that’s so fucking sweet.”

“I called Virgil at one in the morning,” Logan said, “I was practically hyperventilating. Though, it didn’t take long for the conclusion to become obvious; I needed to marry you.”

“You think we’re nuts, getting engaged this early?” Remus asked.

  
“No more nuts then we’ve already both proven to be,” Logan said with a yawn, “Do you think we are?”  
  
“Nah,” Remus replied, “We just know exactly what we want a little earlier than other folks. Nothing wrong with that.”

“Definitely not,” Logan agreed, feeling Remus’s grip on him grow tighter and more sleepily. “Goodnight, dear. I love you.”

“Night, night, Dragonfly,” Remus muttered against his chest, “Love you too.”

Remus and Logan drifted to slumber, eased by the knowledge that once they awoke, this wouldn’t have been a dream. They were engaged, no matter how humorous it had played out. They had both been so desperate, unknowingly chasing the same goal, and now here they were. If they were to marry as soon as tomorrow, they’d do so gratefully, so long as they were together. They wouldn’t do that, of course, they’d plan something a little more carefully than that. Pure joy permeated their minds as they slept, dreaming of a future together.

=+=

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter might be the final one, but we'll see if I squeeze an epilog out of this. I'd love to hear what you thought and, as always, have a wonderful day/night!


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally, the wedding is upon us!

“What if he doesn’t show up?”

“Remus, you and I both know that’s preposterous. You two proposed to each other on the same day, for crying out loud! He’s crazy about him and you’re crazy about him. Or maybe just crazy, in general, I can never tell.” 

Remus delivered a well-deserved shove, earning an overdramatic gasp.

“Okay, but what if – what if he’s woken up and decided he doesn’t want to go through with it? What if clarity struck him that he doesn’t want this? _Jesus_ , Roman, what if he stands me up at the alter?!”

“Easy, there, brother dear. You’re sounding a lot like Panic! At the Everywhere,” he said, placing a hand on the small of his brother’s back. Remus stared at his reflection in the mirror, cringing at the unsteadiness of his stance.

“I can’t tell if comparing me to your boyfriend is an insult or a compliment.”

“I’m _saying_ , there’s nothing to be worried about,” Roman said as soothingly as he could manage. “You and Logan are _simply meant to be_ ,” – he sang that bit, eliciting a groan -, “To so much as think that our resident nerd would stand you up at the alter is prosperous and you _know_ it.”

“But what if –.”

“No more ‘what ifs’, thank you very much,” Roman interrupted, “Remus, Logan is deeply, and madly in love with you. You could walk out there wearing nothing but a filthy potato sack and he’d still think you were the most beautiful thing to walk the Earth. Luckily, for a trash man, you clean up pretty nice.”

Remus stared intently at his reflection. The suit he wore was a dark forest green, the shirt beneath an only slightly more unsettling lime, the black and green tie (good lord, it was a lot of green, not that Roman was surprised) a nice striped pattern. Remus’s usually unruly hair was neatly combed, and he looked quite a bit more presentable than usual.

“You think so?” Roman couldn’t help but be stricken with a pang of surprise. Normally, Remus didn’t give two shits what anyone, save for Logan, thought about him, or his appearance for that matter. But now, in a moment of unjustified, but understandable, panic, he was genuinely asking.

“Of course I do,” Roman said, taking his hand off of his twin’s back, “You look wonderful, Remus. And – we’re twins, so I’d be a little concerned if you looked _that_ much worse than me.”

“Everyone knows I’m the better looking one,” Remus said, a hint of a smile appearing on his face. Roman barked out a laugh.

“We’re identical!”

“And yet my point still stands.” Roman huffed out a breath.

“I’m supposed to be the cocky one, _I’m_ supposed to be the romantic one, stop stealing my bits!”

“And yet you’re still not engaged. Before we know it, your dear emo nightmare will have been swept up by another, _far_ better man.” The smile that stretched across Roman’s face is sure to spell trouble. “Okay, why are you looking at me like that? Did you guys get engaged and not tell me? Because if so, fuck you.” Roman stuck a hand in his pocket, fishing out a ring box.

“Is that so?” Roman asked, popping the box open and showing his brother the amethyst ring inside.

“Son of a bitch, you’ve finally decided to stop being such a little pussy, huh?” This time Remus was the one who received the shove.

“Keep talking like that and I’ll propose to him in the _middle_ of your wedding.” Remus narrowed his eyes.

“I would kill you where you stood.”

“You’re all talk, brother dear.”

“Oh yeah?” Remus asked, uncapping the green nail polish he’d applied to his finger and waving the brush near Roman. “Keep talking like that and the suit gets it!” Roman pressed a hand to his chest, glaring at his twin.

“You wouldn’t _dare_.” Remus glared right back.

“Try me, bitch.” Roman scoffed, holding his hands in the air, backing away from Remus who was still dangerously wielding the polish.

“Okay, okay, I surrender!” Roman said, hands guarding the front of his ruby red suit, “I’m not actually going to propose to Virgil at _your_ wedding, for God’s sake.”

“I wouldn’t put it past you.”

“You wound me!” Roman squawked before he caught sight of the look in his twin’s eyes. “Hey, it’s going to be okay. This is one of the best days of your life! You get to promise your undying love for one of my best friends, which can admittedly still be kind of weird to think about, but it’s great! You guys are great. A power-couple, as far as I’m concerned.” Remus’s lips curled into a faint grin.

“Yeah… we are pretty great, huh? I didn’t… I never thought I was the kind of person to get married. I was sure it was the bachelor’s life for me, y’ know? I figured I was always gonna end up alone.” Roman placed a hand on his brother’s shoulder, compassion glimmering in his eyes.

“But you haven’t,” Roman reminded, “You aren’t alone anymore, Remus. You have Logan, and me, and our friends. You’ll never have to be alone again. You –,” Roman paused his speech, seeing tears beginning to haze Remus’s vision, “Oh no you don’t! I just did your makeup, and I refuse to have it ruined before the ceremony has started. Don’t you dare get all soft on me.” Remus sniffed.

“I – I can’t help it. Before, I was all angsty thinking I was some kind of fucking lone-wolf or something, and then I met Logan. And – and you were back in my life, and I had friends, and – _everything’s_ so different, Ro. It’s a g-good different, but still… still weird, sometimes.”

“And you can cry about it later!” Roman insisted, earning a watery chuckle from Remus. “Stop it or you’ll get me starting too, and you’ll be late for your own damn wedding.”

Remus and Logan had only been engaged for five months, yet the wait had been grueling. Honestly, when they woke up the morning after their engagement, there was a moment where they, briefly, considered a Courthouse Wedding.

“We could be married _tomorrow_ ,” Remus had said, “Wouldn’t that be fucking awesome?”

“It would be nice to call you my husband as soon as possible,” Logan had said, despising the fact that he was actually considering it.

“Oooh! We could get married in Vegas! Drive down, get hitched, _and_ get rich!” Logan had rolled his eyes, though the gesture was full of nothing but fondness.

“That’s a terrible idea and you know it. Also, you're a terrible gambler."

“C’mon, Dragonfly, live a little!”

“We’re not getting married in Las Vegas.”

“Ugh, _fiiiiine_. But you’re no fun!” Logan had chuckled at that, pressing a kiss to Remus’s lips.

“So I’ve been told.”

In the end, the couple decided that a proper wedding was what they wanted, even if it meant they’d have to wait a little bit longer to officially call themselves husbands. They wanted their friends to be a part of the celebration, and while they were by no means looking for opulence, a fairly nice venue was on their wish-list.

The one they’d found was outdoor, near a gorgeous lake with sprawling greenery and they couldn’t be happier with it. In all honesty, Remus would be content with marrying Logan in a rat-infested dumpster so long as he promised to be his, but that wouldn’t exactly be ideal.

But now, here he was, about to tie the knot in a beautiful location, about to promise forever to the love of his life. Remus figured he was allowed to freak out, at least a little bit.

“It’s just about time to go,” Roman said after Remus had a few more minutes to collect himself, “Are you ready?” Remus took a steadying breath, giving his reflection a final once-over before nodding, his head bouncing up and down a touch too erratically.

“Yeah… yeah, okay, I’m ready.”

If someone had told Remus a few years ago that his brother would walk him down this aisle at his wedding, he would’ve called them crazy. But now, stepping out into the picturesque spring day, his arm looped with Roman’s, he couldn’t be any more grateful.

The music swelled as the twins walked down the aisle. Remus’s eyes grazed over the guests, his wonderful friends looking back at him with so much love. And then, his eyes met Logan’s, and his heart stopped.

Logan wore a Navy-blue suite, his tie a pink and aqua floral pattern. Logan was often so insistent on the fact that his wardrobe, especially as a teacher, was to make him look as professional as possible (aside from the Unicorn onesie, but that was rarely spoken about), so he usually forwent wearing fun patterns. Seeing him now, though, Remus would have to make a point to mention how amazing he looked in it. How amazing he looked in general.

“Hey,” Remus said quietly, once the chatter of the guests had died down and the minister began speaking. Logan gave him a look that absolutely melted his heart into a gooey, sticky mess (Remus wondered what it would look like if a human heart really did melt. It would be fantastically gorey!) and muttered his own greeting. It took absolutely every ounce of Remus’s self-control not to grab Logan by the lapels and kiss him with every intense, sappy emotion that roared inside of him.

“We are gathered here today to witness the union of Remus Knightly and Logan Sanders,” the minister announced, but immediately, Remus felt like his ears were plugged up with cotton. All he could focus on was Logan, stunning, incredibly, way too hot for his own good, Logan. The sun shone down on them, bathing his fiancé in a light he dared to call heavenly as if all that touched Logan was divine. Remus certainly thought so. So much as _looking_ at him was prompting tears, but it seemed Logan wasn’t in much better shape, his eyes becoming misty behind his glasses.

Remus was only able to snap out of once Logan began to deliver his vows, desperately wanting once again to kiss him breathless.

“Remus, I’ve told you innumerable times how much I struggle to comprehend my emotions,” Logan began, his voice already beginning to waver, “for so long, I considered feelings the bane of my existence. It didn’t make any sense to me, and it all felt so complicated and strange. Today, not much of that has changed. I still struggle greatly with comprehending my emotions. But that doesn’t distract from the fact that I am madly, frantically in love with you.

“Before you, I never imagined what it would be like to wake up beside someone and feel… such unabashed joy. You make me laugh, utilizing a sense of humor I never thought I would indulge in. You make me feel so good about myself, just by being yourself,” Logan said, tears beginning to slip down his cheeks, though Remus wasn’t too far behind him, “You’ve taught me so much, my love, and you’ll never know the extent of how much you mean to me.

“I cannot imagine anything better than calling you, my husband. Domesticity is not something I considered for myself but now – now I _crave_ it. I want to wake up beside you every day of my life. I want to watch documentaries together and cuddle on the couch, I want you to read me your books in every voilent detail, I want to kiss you for as long as I’m able. I love you, Remus Demetri Nightly, with every bit of my being, and to be yours is something I know is one of the best things to happen to me.”

“F-fuck, Dragonfly, how the hell am I gonna get through this after that?” Remus asked through a watery laugh. Thirty minutes ago, Remus was terrified of the eyes that would be on him, and the prospect of Logan deciding he didn’t want this after all but standing before him, such fears dissipated.

“You’re perfect,” Remus said, taking one of Logan’s hands in his own, “You’re absolutely perfect, and I’m never going to stop saying it. You’re the smartest, most beautiful, incredible person I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing, and sometimes, I still can’t believe you fell for me. I hadn’t been happy for so long before I knew that, and y-you brought me so much joy, the moment you were in my life.

You’ve brought me love, a feeling I d-didn’t know I was capable of truly feeling. You brought my brother back to me,” Roman was sobbing somewhere in the crowd, his fingers laced tightly with Virgil’s, “You’ve brought _light_ into my life. I didn’t know if I’d ever be hopeful again b-but I am! I’m hopeful for the life we’ll lead, f-for the things we’ll do. I’m hopeful for anything, as long as I’m with you. I love you Logan Sanders, and I’ll tell you every chance I get for as long as I can. I’ll do everything I can to give you the world, because you deserve it, e-every bit of it.”

Tears rolled down both of their faces, their smiles unbreakable. There was an exchange of rings, slipped onto their fingers, and glimmering in the sunlight.

“Do you, Logan Sanders, take Remus Sanders to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do you part?” Logan nodded; his teary eyes trained on Remus.

“I do.”

“Do you, Remus Knightly, take –.”

“ _Yes_ , of course, I fucking do!” Remus interrupted, earning a laugh from several of the guests. The officiant sighed, rolling with it.

“By the power vested in me, I pronounce you Husband and Husband. You may kiss the groom.”

Remus surged forward, his hands gripping Logan’s tie and pulling him into a deep kiss, the cheering of the guests ringing in their ears.

Later, there would be tearful speeches and endless hugs. Roman would give a sappily embarrassing best man's speech (And not propose to his boyfriend at Remus’s wedding, _thank god_. He’d wait another day to do that) that made Remus’s fondness and annoyance of his brother swell in tandem. Later, Remus would shove cake with green and blue icing in Logan’s face, only to earn the same fate. Later, they’d share their first dance under the moonlight, hoping for a lifetime of shotty footwork and stifled laughter. Impressively, Remus only stepped on Logan’s feet twice. Later, they’d do so much more, accomplish all that they wanted.

Now, though, they embraced, holding each other as though they’d disappear the moment they let go.

“I love you, Logan Knightly-Sanders,” Remus whispered in his ear, kissing him ardently.

“And I love you, Remus Knightly-Sanders,” Logan responded, intent on never stopping kissing if he could help it.

=+=

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can you tell I know nothing about weddings? Seriously, though, this was such a sweet chapter to write, and there's only the epilog after this! I swear, I've gotten so attached to this story! I'd love to hear what you thought and, as always, have a wonderful day/night.


	13. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Epilogue time, babey!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How many times can I make them say "I love you"? The answer is a whole hell of a lot.

“Is that the last of the boxes?” Logan asked, leaning against the wall. Remus scoffed from where he was on the floor, opening a box of cups and plates.

“Hell no. There’s still a fuck-ton in the truck; go on lazy bones, get going.” Logan shook his head, sending Remus a teasing glare.

“Is that a very nice attitude to have with your husband?” He asked, knowing it made Remus’s heart skip a beat every time he said it. Even after being married for a few months, the word ‘husband’ threw him like nothing else.

“C’mon, Dragonfly.” Logan sighed, though more out of fondness than exhaustion.

“Fine, but only to get you to shut your mouth,” Logan said, opening the door and heading back to the moving truck.

“Hey! Who’s being mean now?” Remus called, but Logan was already outside.

In actuality, Remus knew there was no way they were going to manage to fully unpack, at least not tonight. But they’d do the essentials, and likely order pizza after being too tired to make dinner.

They’d been looking for houses the moment they were engaged, eager to have a bit more space for whatever – or _whoever_ – came into their lives in the future. Finally, Remus had an office where he could write in peace and fill it with as much horror memorabilia as he wished without cluttering their shared space with posters and action figures. Remus’s latest novel was a best-seller, which certainly helped cement the fact that purchasing a house was exactly what they wanted to do.

Remus looked around the still fairly empty living room, aside from a few pieces of furniture, knowing it would soon be filled with clutter and liveliness. It was homey, really, _genuinely_ homey. He’d always thought people were being dramatic when they walked into a house and said they just knew it was perfect for them, but that was exactly how he’d felt the moment he’d walked in. He could see himself living in it instantly, could see Logan with him, and somewhere down the line, kids.

The house wasn’t huge, but it was nice, and it _felt_ right, and there was even space to put in a garden in the backyard. Remus couldn’t believe he was considering taking up gardening of all things; he’d sworn to himself he wouldn’t ever become so painfully domestic and cliché, but he couldn’t make good on that promise.

He thought back to the years before Logan when he and Roman were apart and he felt like he was alone and scattered to the wind. It was almost impossible to contemplate now, having been surrounded by so much love, unlike what he thought he’d ever be able to receive. 

Remus could hardly recognize his past. The man he’d been lived on in memories, but they were fading more with each passing day. Remus didn’t necessarily like to consider his life before Logan a blur. There were certain people he’d considered friends at the time, and accomplishments he was at least a little proud of, but all of that paled in comparison to what he had now.

“Are you alright?” Remus peaked up from the box he’d been staring absently into, seeing Logan standing beside him with a look of concern in his eyes.

“I’m fine. Great. Like, really, really great,” Remus announced a dopey grin on his face.

“If you’re so ‘great’, then why have you stopped helping me? You were just chastising me a moment ago,” Logan said, before pausing, a concerned look creeping onto his face. “Remus, what’s the matter?”

“Absolutely nothing,” Remus said, offering Logan’s extended hand and making it to his feet, “I’m just feeling particularly sappy right about now. Have I told you how beautiful you look today?” Logan chuckled lightly.

“I’m wearing a stained T-shirt, my hair’s a mess, frankly we’re _both_ quite a mess.”

“And yet you’re still the prettiest thing I ever did see,” Remus said with a smile, wrapping his arms around Logan and pulling him close.

“I could say the same about you,” Logan said, pressing a kiss to his husband’s lips before pulling back, “Now, why don’t you help me finish unpacking some more, and then we can both be as sappy as you’d like. After all, you were just complaining about my lack of initiative.”

“Sure,” Remus agreed, “Yeah, okay. That sounds good.”

The couple takes in several more boxes, unpacking a while longer, and set up the TV before settling down on the couch and ordering some pizza. The days ahead would include a fair amount more of unpacking, but for now, they were content with the work they’d done (and too tired for much more).

“Still feeling particularly sappy, are we?” Logan asked once they’d finished their dinner and were sitting together watching a film neither of them were paying too much attention to. Remus blinked; unaware he’d been staring.

“Yeah, I guess so,” Remus said, grabbing Logan’s hand and lacing their fingers together, “How can I not? I mean, _look_ at you.”

“What’re you up to, Mr. Knightly-Sanders?” Logan asked, his voice light and teasing, though there was a hint of suspicion that made itself present. Remus pressed his free hand to his chest, gasping like a dramatic starlet.

“I can’t believe you! I’m complimenting you, and profess my boundless, unyielding love for you,” Remus paused to press a drawn-out, slow but passionate kiss to Logan’s lips, “And you doubt my intentions?”

“I doubt your intentions when you get that look in your eyes,” Logan said pointedly.

“A look? Whatever do you mean?” Remus asked batting his eyelashes.

“ _Remus_.”

“Okay, fine. I’ll just go ahead and ask.”

“By all means,” Logan said, “What is it that you wanted to discuss?”

“Can we get a dog?” Remus asked, his eyes almost comically wide, “Pretty, pretty _please_?” Logan sighed.

“We just started moving into the house today. Life is fairly hectic at the moment.”

“We don’t have to get one tomorrow,” Remus pointed out, “Just soon. C’mon, Dragonfly, we talked about getting a pet before.” Logan nodded.

“Yes, I suppose you’re right.”

“And we could train them to be a watchdog! Wouldn’t that be the coolest! Can we get one Logan, please!”

“…Maybe.” Remus grinned widely, climbing into his husband’s lap and kissing him senseless (Remus knew that ‘maybe’ was a surefire yes. Within a few weeks, they’d have brought home their rescue German Shepard, Duke, who Logan became incredibly fond of almost immediately).

Once their movie had finished and the pair still sat together in a tangle of limbs on the couch, Logan spoke up.

“What’re you thinking about?”

“Huh?” Remus asked, peaking up from where he’d been lying on Logan’s shoulder.

“You’ve been quiet. What’s on your mind?” Remus smiled, snuggling back into Logan’s side and laying his head back on his husband’s shoulder.

“Absolutely everything. How much I love you, and how fucking happy I am being with you, and how _right_ this house feels. I didn’t think I was the type to get such a domestic happy ending… did you ever think this would be you? Married, a house, sappy as all fuck?” Remus already knew the answer, but he couldn’t help but ask.

“No,” Logan said, running a hand through Remus’s frazzled hair, “No, not at all. I didn’t have any kind of expectations like this for my life. And yet here we are, and I can’t be more pleased with how things have turned out. I love you too, my dear, more than anything.”

“Remember when you claimed you were ‘emotionless’? That wasn’t that long ago.”

“Claimed? I don’t know what you mean. I’ve never felt a single emotion in all my life.” Remus laughed, loud and unabashedly happy, weighed down only slightly from exhaustion.

“Oh, how silly of me to forget. I’m married to a robot.” Logan hummed, laughing lightly as he pressed a kiss into Remus’s hair. “A robot with a fantastic ass.”

“As I am a robot who feels absolutely nothing, that statement means nothing to me.”

“Oh yeah?” Remus asked, a teasing infliction infiltrating his voice. “So you don’t feel anything when I tell you you’re the smartest, most beautiful, most incredible, best robot husband in the world and that I love you more than anything?”

“Of course, not,” Logan lied through his teeth, though he couldn’t suppress the smile be broke out into when Remus kissed him. Remus smiled, yawning as he leaned against Logan. “Tired?”

“Mhmm. You’re comfy.”

“Our bed will be far more comfortable than my shoulder.”

“Maybe,” Remus said, already beginning to shut his eyes.

“I refuse to sleep on the couch in our first night in this house,” Logan said, moving Remus off of him and making it to his feet. Remus whined at the loss of contact before Logan grabbed his hand and helped him up.

“Come on, we’ve got a lot more unpacking tomorrow. We need to rest.” Remus let out another groan before allowing Logan to lead him out of the living room and start getting ready for bed.

Within minutes, Remus was back in the security of Logan’s embrace, lying in their darkened bedroom beginning to drift off.

Some level of unfamiliarity still buzzed in the air. Sleeping for the first night in a new place is always an odd experience, even if it’s somewhere you want to be. But Remus knew that soon the familiarity and comfort of their apartment would be replaced with this house, and all of the new memories they were sure to make.

As he clung tightly to his husband, Remus pondered all that had led up to this moment, and all that lay ahead. He wasn’t usually the type to have grant expectations for how life would turn out. For so long, he’d had so little left to hold on to. Hope was a fleeting thing; and yet now, Remus couldn’t help but look forward to what the future had in store.

He thought of what life would be like with Logan from here on out, married, tending a house together, soon owning a dog, and somewhere down the line, adopting children. Remus had been so sure for so long that such a future lived on only in the minds of the delusional, but here he found himself, hoping for those very things.

Less than two years ago, Remus had been at a point where he had so few people to turn to and nothing that particularly excited him in life, and now he had Logan, his brother, and the wonderful friends he’d made.

Soon, he’d be walking Roman down the aisle just like his twin had done for him, seeing him marry his emo nightmare and get his very own fairytale ending. And if his suspicions were correct – and they most certainly were; he’d caught Patton browsing Jeweler websites – Patton and Janus would soon be engaged too.

Remus drifted to sleep, lying against Logan’s chest and whispering a final exhausted declaration of love before being greeted with unconsciousness.

And in the morning, when the sunlight shone through the window, illuminating the half-furnished bedroom with boxes on the floor in all its glory and he saw Logan, hair ruffled from sleep and eyes bleary, he’d feel just the same he did the morning he decided he wanted to marry him.

The End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's a wrap on First Comes Love! This story was such a joy to write and your comments have been so uplifting and appreciated. I hope you had fun reading this one because I certainly had fun writing it. Have a wonderful day/night, and thanks for reading!


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